Chapter 21
"It was four years ago," she started, and I moved us so her head was on my chest and my hand was playing with her hair. I looked down at her hands to see the ring I had bought her still adorning her finger. I smiled at the fact that she wore it. I've never seen her take it off. "I was a junior in high school, and my brother was a senior. Anyways, he was my best friend. I didn't have many friends in school, because I didn't conform, you know? I wasn't the classic girl, and even my name was unique, and so I didn't fit in. Naturally, that meant that nobody liked me. So I would hang out with my brother everyday instead, and I don't think either of us minded. We weren't like normal siblings, who fought and stuff. We got along all of the time. My brother was different from me, though. He had all of the friends in school, and every girl wanted to date him. He was popular, and he did fit in, yet he still wanted to hangout with me. My mom preferred him over me. I didn't mind, because even I preferred him over myself, but it still stung. He'd get these amazing birthday and Christmas presents, and I never did. My mom claimed it was because I already had everything I could ever need, and that Aster was off to college next year. He needed things more than I did. But there's flaws in those statements, and I just pretended to ignore them, because I didn't want to fight with Aster. He'd get a birthday cake on his birthday, whatever flavor he wanted. I haven't had a birthday cake since I was 10. Apart from the one your mom made me, that is. Anyways, one year, he picked my favorite cake flavor, German Chocolate, even though he hated it. He couldn't stand the texture of coconut, but he asked for it just because he wanted to make me happy. He was the best brother I could ever ask for."
She paused for a second, swallowing before continuing on.
"Anyways, it was halfway through junior year, when it happened. He was almost graduated, with plans to go to law school, following my mother's footsteps. Another reason she preferred him over me. I wanted to be a vet, and she couldn't fathom that thought. Aster was always supporting me, though, telling me to do what I wanted and to ignore mom. I wasn't going to go through with becoming a vet until he told me to. I was preparing to apply for law school when he saw the forms, and yelled at me. He knew I didn't want it, and he just ripped the papers up and told me to do what I wanted, not what my mom wanted. I cried, because it was the first time Aster yelled at me in years, even though he was only doing it for my own good. We got into a fight, and I didn't talk to him for three days. He came in and apologized to me, even though he shouldn't have. I apologized afterwards, realizing my mistake, and we were fine. Well anyways, halfway through junior year, there was this new movie out, 'The Crazies'. It was this scary movie that everybody in school was talking about, and so we decided to go see it. My mom didn't know, since we just snuck out, but she soon realized and was blowing up my phone. On the way home, after we had seen the movie, my phone would not stop going off, so I looked down at it. It was only for a second. A second that changed everything in my life. A second that I would take back if I could. But I can't. I looked down, and only had enough time to read who sent it. My mom. And then I heard Aster yell, 'Watch out!'. And by the time I looked up, it was too late. A car was in our lane, going straight toward us, and I tried to steer out of its path, but I didn't have enough time to think correctly, so I turned the wheel left, instead of right like I should have. The car ended up hitting Aster's side of the car. He died on impact. The guy that hit us was drunk driving, and he steered into our lane. But I looked down at my phone, and that took up time that I would have had otherwise. If I had just had that extra second to think it through, maybe I could have turned my car right, and went into the grass instead of putting Aster in the position to be hit. Maybe I could have turned left, and had enough time to make it across without the car hitting him first. If I hadn't looked down at my phone, or if I hadn't turned left, Aster could be alive right now. He would be in law school, doing great things with his life. My mom wouldn't blame me for the loss of her greatest child, and I wouldn't blame myself. I would've graduated high school on time, instead of now. The people at school wouldn't act as though I'm a murderer. They would ignore me, like they always had, instead of looking at me as though I purposely did it. Everything would be different."
