@AmazingPhil Do I Know You?

And at that exact moment it felt like pure euphoria

CHAPTER 5

Phil's POV

I entered the classroom that I started off in that day, and returned to my seat from the first time I was in this room. I had last lesson with Chris so he walked with me to form, as I had a tendency to get lost. I leaned back slightly on my chair and got out my phone, immediately scrolling through my notifications, not bothering to look who they were from. Slowly more people began filling up the room and I took no notice of my surroundings.

I was just scrolling through my twitter, when someone tipped back my chair slightly, making me feel like I was slowly falling into the centre on the earth. I let out a high pitched squeal as I slowly plummeted to my end. When it stopped. I look up to a bent over Dan howling in laughter, while holding the edge of my chair and slowly putting me upright. I watch as tears brim his eyes with laughter, and him trying to calm himself down. How many times today does he want to scare me on my first day!

"Well thanks for that heart attack Dan! I was just accepting my death there and then! My life flashed before my eyes!" I say slightly higher pitched, than my usual tone. Dan just gets out the last bit of laughter and says a muffled "sorry". I give him a smile before; we are all forced to sit down in silence for the last 5 minutes of the day.

A few minutes of useless rambling from our teacher later, we are free to leave! I get my bag and pull out my headphones from my pocket, quickly shoving the plug into the headphone slot of my phone. I open Spotify and shuffle my playlist of favourite songs, though immediately get confronted with an advertisement...great. I swear everyone on earth has that premium crap and can skip as many times as they want or whatever! Yeah people, I'll go listen to my advert now!

By the time I got out of the school gates, the advert had ended. I started walking when the song 'first day of my life' rung in my ears, I smiled at the song as of the reminder of how happy sounding the song was. See I can listen to panic! or fall out boy, but that doesn't mean I have to stick to that type of music! Music is like a language. You usually speak the one you are most familiar with and like, so for me would be more rock and punk, but now and again you can speak different languages and still like them! I can fluently speak punk but I can also speak a little indie!

And you said, this is the first day of my life

I'm glad I didn't die before I met you,

The sounds flow into my ears, soft strums of guitar and gentle, loving words. They filled my mind with shots of happiness and relaxed any thoughts I had. See when I write I don't know exactly what I'm writing. I can write endlessly about relationships and love, though not of it is from my own personal side. I don't know whether butterflies happen when you accidently bump into one another? I don't how a kiss really happens, or whether certain sounds are produced during smut? I'm a phony if you will. I just take other people's situations and twist my own words around them. Changing them to fit my character, to which I have twisted, combining some parts of my own personality with them.

But somehow that's what people love?

Why live your own life, when you can write it vicariously through another's! Changing how you would want your own life too be, whether it's crazy or simple, anything will work in the fanfiction universe! You can create your whole life story but rename yourself as someone you know better than yourself! For Christ sake you can get a man pregnant if you wanted, have them live in space, kill them off even! You could plan your own funeral and have anyone come to it! The possibilities are endless! Our own creativity makes other happy, filling up their hours with your own life and they don't even know it, you're giving away secrets you've never told anyone to millions of people online, and they don't even know it's you.

That's why I write.

That's why I run a blog, a fan account. I am still Phil Lester. Just no one knows that. To everyone I'm Phil. The fanboy. The obsessed, nerdy, not so innocent fanboy, who doesn't care what people think about him, who will freely spill out any thought on his mind. Not be scared of what people say of his sexuality, personality, opinions, or choices. I'm just @AmazingPhil.

Its winter now, so darkness arrives quickly, as I seen I've been walking for almost an hour. I think my thoughts had slowed me down, and turned me into an agonisingly slow tortoise. I have been looking down at my phone so long that the night seemed even darker than before. I look up. Clouds had surrounded the sky all day so the chances of seeing stars were like winning the lottery.

I think I won the lottery.

I look up to hundreds of small dots of light, scattered around the pitch black sky. I look more right to see the moon, beaming down light, as the longer you look the more clear I can see. Ever small crater and shaded area could be seen and a small translucent shimmer, circled the outside of the moon. I look more left this time and see three stars, in a perfect line, a lot brighter than the others. Wait.

"shhhh—ine a light" I exclaim under my breath as I look at the placement of surrounding stars, to see, none other than the constellation which is Orion's belt! I check a couple times to make sure and trace the outline with my index finger, feeling my eyes widen at the small discovery. And at that exact moment it felt like pure euphoria, my headphones then let out the first sounds of coldplays 'yellow'

Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah, they were all yellow.

I came along,
I wrote a song for you,
And all the things you do,
And it was called "Yellow".

So then I took my turn,
Oh what a thing to have done,
And it was all yellow.

Your skin,
Oh yeah your skin and bones,
Turn into
Something beautiful,
Do you know,
You know I love you so,
You know I love you so.

I swam across,
I jumped across for you,
Oh what a thing to do.
'Cause you were all yellow,

I drew a line,
I drew a line for you,
Oh what a thing to do,
And it was all yellow.

Your skin,
Oh yeah your skin and bones,
Turn into
Something beautiful,
Do you know,
For you I'd bleed myself dry,
For you I'd bleed myself dry.

It's true,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine for you,
Look how they shine.

Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And all the things that you do.

A/N

I'M SO SORRY!!!! I've had so much work and stress and UGH! So I got writing and I got you this chapter as an early Christmas gift! I'm sorry it's a bit rambly (is that a word?) but yeah I have no excuse I got writing and couldn't stop :) 

Oh and I really did see Orion's belt, seriously I was so excited it was unbelievable! The night was so clear and there was no clouds and the moon was so clear and the stars were so prominent and constellation was so pretty and... I'm rambling again...

 Anyway this is last you'll see me, I think till new year unless I get the chance to write again but yeah HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND MAY YOU HAVE THE BEST NEW YEAR!

SO VOTE AND COMMENT OR SOME OTHER SHIZZ!

I LOVE YOU SQUISHES!

Twitter: @ dottymathers

Tumblr: blacklovingphangirl.tumblr.com