Living Dolls

1Heide

  It was difficult to keep my attention on my aide, through all the idle chatter and footsteps that were being projected around me.

As we walked towards the campus where this care area was ensuing, I kept blinking up at her, squinting a bit, trying to piece together what she was saying.

"You'll have to get used to it - it's about that time." Terri said, and her hand tightened a bit on mine. I could feel it shaking, and I was tempted to ask why. "We've been going over it for months now. Think you could do it?" She flashed me a smile, and I again noted the tightening of her grip.

"Of course!" I nodded with a beam, bouncing a bit on my steps. "You know, the other day, I played duck duck goose with the other kids."

"I know that." Her smile softened, "And you were so good."

"Will there be duck duck goose here?"

"Maybe. Try being the leader of it!"

We approached the gates, being greeted by a lady with a clipboard. We stopped short once we reached her, and she, flashing us smiles, said, "Welcome. Names, and how old?"

Wanting to impress Terri, I jumped up with a grin, cutting off her words, "Heide, and I'm ten!"

The woman gave me a bright smile, but Terri only blinked down at me. It sent me into a sulking, pouty state almost instantly. "What a pretty name," The woman said, writing down at her clipboard. My attention spiked up when I saw her peel something from it. A sticker! She handed it to me, and I was beginning to turn it around and stare at it, until she instructed me, "Put it on your shirt, sweetie."

"Keep it on, don't take it off." Terri quietly told me as I plastered on the stickered ID, then looked at the woman with her own presentable smile, "My name's Terri Hanson, and I'll be the one..." She gulped, and coughed a bit. Such a scratchy voice; I hate sore throats too. "I'll be the one picking her up." She says, tone still hoarse as she clears her throat.

"At what time do you assume you'd be here?"

"Huh? Oh, um, at seven." She told me I'd have to be here until it closes earlier, which would be about six hours! I better find something to pass that time. "I'll be here to pick her up at seven." She repeats, starting to look around.

"Have you in now." The woman finished scribbling in her clipboard.

I was about to just ran through the gate past the woman, but then remembered that I hadn't said goodbye to Terri yet. Turning to look up at her, I beamed, "See you later-!" But then saw her glancing around all over again.

She seemed startled at my voice and movements for a second. Then after a pause, she sighed with a smile and knelt down in front of me. Hands grabbing at my shoulders, she smiled, "I want you to have fun. Okay?"

I nodded, "Okay! Of course I'll try."

Another light cough, cracking of her voice, "And I want you to be good, alright? Listen when you're told to."

"Oka-"

"But most importantly, I want you to be safe."

"I will!"

Her eyes go wide for a second, before she spurts out with a chuckle, "I mean... Don't trip or get rowdy now, okay?" She says, and I nod. "Great. Be safe, be good, and be happy." After a pause, she hugs me, and I take it with a gleeful laugh. "I love you, I'll miss you."

"Love you too!" Once she releases me, I step back towards the gates, grinning at her soft smile and tilted head, before turning and going through, "See you later!"

It's not very often that she leaves me in places like this, so there is a twitch in my chest that I'm tempted to dwell on. However, knowing how that always ended, I tried my hardest to move past it. This is practice, practice, practice. Yeah, that's right!

I explored through the outer parts of the campus. There was enough people out here, so I had a clear view instantly of the people. Youngest around six it looked like (though I knew there had to be be younger inside), and oldest thirteen. Maybe even fourteen! It made me shudder, but what calmed me was the thought that I'd be there, someday.

There was a large array of activities out here. Basketball in the courts, soccer in the fields, and tons of others in both or the borders. Skip it, jump rope, hop scotch, I even saw some kids racing each other in the tracks! I was tempted, especially by the hop scotch, but decided to look around some more before deciding on that.

As predicted, in the rooms, I found the younger kids. They were coloring, or just sitting around watching TV. Ah, the most tempting. I had to keep shaking my head to go on in the other rooms.

Eventually, my resistance crumbles. When I enter the third room, I can't help but stop and stare at the dollhouse in the corner. I look around, body already twitching, before I set my jaw and make my way over there.

While standing, the dollhouse reached to about my chest. I ran my fingers along the rooftop, before falling on my knees to look inside. Two floors, and two rooms on the second. The furniture in the rooms aren't plastic like the ones I had, they look almost real. The dolls inside either stand around, sit in chairs, one lying in bed.

Captivated, I reach over to grab at one of the dolls that are standing. Though, the second my fingers touch it, it retreats in surprise at a voice that hits me from the side, making the doll knock down on it's housed floor.

"Those are mine, you know."

Startled, my narrowed eyes shoot over to the approaching boy. "Oh-" Flushing, I bring my hand back near me, "Sorry, I was just-"

"I didn't say you couldn't play with it!" He cries out, stopping in his tracks and shaking his hands rapidly, "I just, well, thought you'd wanna know."

Taking a closer look at him with a squint, I began to relax upon seeing that he was about my age, having a similar appearance to my boy classmates. It was easier for me to talk to people my own age. "They're yours? And you dragged 'em all the way over here to play with!?" I blurt out, shocked.

"Hm? Oh, no!" He laughed, and sat beside me. Blinking, I lowered down until I was sitting as well. Smiling, his hand reached in the dollhouse to set the doll back up to stand. "A lot of the stuff here used to be mine - my parents just took them and put them here."

"How mean! I'd be mad if my parents took my toys away."

He snickered, "Right!? My toys are mine. Well, they kept telling me I have enough toys..." He paused, squinting at nothing, trying to piece his confusion, "Which I ... Guess is true. Maybe. I don't know. Well," He shrugged, "They're gonna give me really good ones soon, so that, um... Conpen... Sate... Makes up for it!"

"So all those toys outside are yours, too?"

"Most of them, yeah. Some others are donations, I think."

Looking back at the dollhouse, I gawked, "So all these are yours? It's so big and it looks real!" With a pout, I grumbled, "I used to have a dollhouse, but it was so small, my parents got rid of it because I wasn't little anymore."

"That's mean." His hands move in the dollhouse again, as he arranges the furniture. "I have lots of these!"

"Lucky!"

A pause, before he looks at me with a bright grin, "I'm even setting up the best one I've ever got! A whole tiny town, I think someone called it."

"How cool! I'd want something like that." I beam, and reach in to move the dolls around the house a bit. The boy stops pushing the furniture, blinking as I tilt and bring them up and down. "I'm Heide, by the way."

He replies, eyes still watching the dolls I move, "I'm Julien." After a second, his eyes go narrow, "W-Wait, Heide?"

"Yeah." I lower the dolls, blinking at him with a smile.

"Oh - um..." Julien looks around, looking lost, then comes back to me with a smile, "Nice name. Now I need to, um, remember it... So!" He beams, grabbing an end of the house's roof, "What if you lived in a house like this?"

"Hm?" I take another look in the house, "Well, I wouldn't want to be alone!"

"But, the toys."

"Do they count as people?"

"Well... To you, they will!"

Julien and I continued to talk, even interacting using the dolls, but eventually, we decided to go outside. "You wanna play soccer?" I knew he would ask that, from the way he watched the soccer kids with an interested gaze, smile creeping at his lips.

Don't get too excited. "No." I say, and he already gapes. "I don't know how!"

"I can teach you!"

"Let's just go play the skip it, I haven't played it in years!" He agreed, but not without a pout and kick at nearby pebbles. He kept getting it right, while I continued to miss over and over again.

For the next few hours, we kept going between lots of the different activities, both inside and outside. Though, despite his numerous asks and even whines, I kept refusing to play soccer. I just liked seeing his angered, stubborn pout.

At around seven o'clock, we were sitting by the gates on the benches. It was near that time when adults came to pick up the kids, and I kept watching, waiting for Terri.

Clearly growing curious over my stares at the gates, Julien tilts his head and asks, "Who are you waiting for?"

"My aide."

"Aide...? Don't you mean babysitter?"

At least he pieced it quicker than others. "Yeah, sure. What about you?"

He blinks, before swinging and kicking his legs with a smile, "Either my parents' workers or these volunteers, I don't know."

"How could you not know!?"

"I wanted to come here today, just to find something." I was tempted to ask if he stole one of his toys, but I kept quiet. "So whoever my parents tell to take me home, they'll do it, they have to." A pause, "Why do you have a babysitter?"

"Because my parents don't have time for me, duh! Why do you have babysitters?"

"I don't have a babysitter!"

"Sounds like you do!" I cry out, and with a pout, slump down in my seat. "I don't know. They're not really busy, they just don't... They don't like listening to me!"

His eyes go a bit wide, and he blinks, "They don't like to?"

"They don't like nothing with me!" I groan. I usually only talked to Terri, and since I was never really allowed to discuss this with her, I used my chance, "They give money to my aide - her name's Terri, to take care of me and talk to me, for I think, four years now? Yeah, four. I always hear them get mad when she's out for some days, where I'm stuck with them."

He keeps giving me that stare. Flushing, I pout and look away, arms crossed over my chest.

"I'm not dumb - I know what they're doing." I say, softening, "They're putting the responsibility of me into other hands. They don't want to deal with me, so they make other people do it."

Tensing up, Julien's eyes widen. Stunned, he looks down at his feet. Then after a pause, he bits his lip, "I... I'm not dumb, either." Looking farther away, he brings his legs up and hugs them, "I know that feeling."

"It's mean. I just want someone to care about me."

"Yeah."

We sit in silence for a few moments, sulking. It takes awhile for us to start talking again, and it's Julien who starts it. Lowering his legs, he gives me an excited looking grin, that I have to look back and pay attention to him.

"Hey," He pressed closer, practically bouncing with his sudden joy, "You want to do something cool?"

Nervously, my eyes drift over to the cars and adults over beyond the gate, and then all the kids running over. The greetings, the hugs, laughs, and smiles. I see no trace of Terri, and it's been seven for awhile. My eyes drift back to the still grinning Julien, and after another flicker of my gaze to the gate, I grin back, "Totally."

With a small, quiet squeal of joy, he jumps off the bench and waits for me to follow, before running down the side of the building. I struggle to catch up with him, and I nearly stop short when I see him fling open the door of the room with the dollhouse. More curiosity getting a hold of me, I bolt in after him.

I nearly cry out when the door slams shut behind me. When I hear a jingle, I turn around, narrowing my eyes when I see Julien, one hand still planted on the shut door, moving some keys around until he puts them in the lock. "I don't want anyone else to see."

Furrowing a brow, I look around in the room, eyes pausing longer on the dollhouse. "So... What'd you want to do?"

"Stay right there!" Beaming, he goes over to the end of the room. I watch him, as he kneels down and pushes the couch away from the edge of the wall. I can see a black, long box from here, but Julien's shoulder begins to cover it.

Another jingle of keys, "You said you wanted someone to care about you?"

"Yeah." I know he told me to stay, but I can't help but walk closer.

"Well, I do!"

I can't help but smile, cheeks heating up. "Thanks. I care about you too-"

"And now I can really show it. I can give a lot to you." He groans a bit, struggling to open the box. I tilt my head, seeing just in time as the suitcase opens. With a triumphant chuckle, his hands move in it, lifting the object up. "A lot."

I'm still smiling at what he said earlier and in excitement of what he was hiding, but when he turns around and points it at me, my face falls, heart stopping for just a second.

"What's that?" Eyes narrow, I put my hands up.

Julien didn't care about my concerning reaction. He keeps smiling at me, the same smile - I knew it was, but then, it seemed completely different. It was only natural for me to think that when he was pointing a gun at me.

Now I wasn't some expert on weaponry or injury or even death, but I did know that all those things tied together. I've watched enough TV to know that. "Hey, that's not funny. You know those could hurt us, right?"

"Hurt us?" His smile went away, but only for a second. He goes back to laughing, "Neither of us will be hurt! I'll be happy, you'll be happy. It's great!"

"No no no no no." Cringing, I begin to step back. "That's scary, it's not fun. Stop messing around, please-"

"Trust me," He stepped over quicker, "It'll be great."

When I see his finger move, I was preparing for any of those blasting sounds. There was one, that was for sure, but it was distorted. Like a ray, a scanner going off. As soon as that sound entered my ears, I just saw the bright color sweep over in my vision. My body felt like it was tingling with burns as the light got brighter and brighter. It all kept increasing, until it all began to die out.