I Think I Lost My Halo ⇒ Joshler

I Know A Thing Or Two About Pain And Darkness

Tyler dedicated all Sunday to trying to contact Josh. He was really getting on the whole family's nerves, and made them on edge a bit, because Tyler walked around the house complaining about mostly everything. So, his mom suggested for him to go out and try to get his mind off things. Tyler was about to argue but his mom handed him a list of things they needed. "Okay. Don't even wait for me to agree or anything..thanks," he took the list and lazily looked it over. Tyler headed out the door without another word to his family and was actually relieved to get out the house.

Honestly his mom would have never noticed something was wrong with Tyler if he didn't bring up Josh every couple of minutes, saying stuff about how the blue haired boy wasn't answering. Tyler has always been grumpy, but once Josh came into his life he has been much happier and not as distant. Josh made Tyler feeling something he never truly felt before, which Mrs. Joseph was rather grateful for.

"Without me you are a real push over."

"Yeah but I actually enjoy having control over my own actions. So you gotta take the good with the bad, I guess."

"Were's my good, huh? All I see is you being 'happy' and me being dragged along for no reason! Josh is just gonna leave you eventually and you know it."

"Or, or, now hear me out on this, he isn't the jerk you keep trying to make me believe he is? Come on Blurry, there is nothing you can do to make me so down on myself it'll give you the chance to hurt him."

"Fine I guess you're right."

"Wait..what did you just say?"

"I said, you are right. There is really nothing I can do to make you hate Josh."

The conversation ended there, and for the first time Tyler actually 'won' one of their conversations. He couldn't help but smile to himself, and Blurryface couldn't help it either. He had Tyler right were he wanted. 'Maybe Tyler being so love sick over some kid isn't such a bad thing after all. I'll let his fantasies become a reality' he though to himself  with a smirk 'just so I can screw him over.' The two went into the store while Blurry thought with a small laugh 'I almost feel kinda bad for him....This'll be better than I originally planned.'

So far nothing eventful was happening at the store. Now to clarify, this was one of those types where there is one big store then a bunch of smaller ones scattered about. It had a food court over by the movie theater. "How this isn't thought of as just a mall I'll never know,'" muttered Blurryface as if he had better things to do other than telling Tyler how the people in the store were laughing at him. Tyler rolled his eyes, "If you want to go so badly, you can go find something better to do..other than wanting my death," Blurry opened his mouth to say something but Tyler beat him to it, "I mean it'll really break my heart to see you go but I understand." Blurry was getting more annoyed by every sarcastic word Tyler spoke. "I think you are forgetting exactly who you're talking to. Actually, seems like lately you really haven't been respecting the only one who will never leave your pathetic ass. How about you take another look at your legs, you cocky shit. You're nothing without me, I own you," he put an emphasis on 'own' which sent shivers down Tyler's spine, "And you can bet your pretty face if you don't learn your place soon-" he was cut off by someone calling out Tyler's name.

Tyler gasped as he accidentally dropped the box of cereal he was pretending to be reading. After all, it's not like he could be staring at empty space as if his life was on the line. Which what it would look like if he ever paid full attention to Blurry out in public. The two looked down the isle and saw none other than, Lana Del Rey. It was hard to catch who was calling his name at first, after all she wasn't looking like her normal self. Lana was wearing some old hoodie, her hair in a messy bun, flip flops, some plain sunglasses, and ripped jeans that were clearly not ripped on purpose.

He forced out a smile and an awkward wave while muttering a hello. She walked up to him and playfully hit him on the arm, "Oh please don't tell me you're the type to get all awkward after just a kiss." To be honest, Tyler totally forgot that even happened. He was feeling awkward about how she can literally still look beautiful even while pulling off the hobo look. Hey, but now the kiss was what he was gonna be awkward about.

"Ha phhft no way..."

"Good because I was wondering if you would like to hangout with a couple of people with me next weekend."

"Love to but I can't live through that again," Blurry forced Tyler to say with a flirtatious smirk on his face.

"Don't worry, it's actually gonna be really small. Only a few people, some beer, Mary jane, but nothing crazy."

"That sounds pretty cool, I guess. Sure."

"See you then," she was about to turn around but said with humor in her voice, "Also, you can bring your adorable boyfriend while your at it." Tyler's face went red while he heard Blurry say 'Oooooooh!' behind him.

"He's not my-"

"Oh please. I saw you two kiss..don't worry I don't think anyone else saw. Everyone was too busy with the fight your other friend was getting into inside."

Tyler looked at her with his mouth slightly opened in shock. Lana took it upon herself to closing it for him with her hand. She leaned in and whispered into his ear, "It would be a shame if somehow that got out. Do you understand?" Tyler nodded in reply. She got into her own personal space again and put on a fake sweet smile as if talking to a child, "See you around."

With that, she walked away. Tyler continued his shopping after standing there, trying to process what just happened. 'Is she..blackmailing me?' he thought as he picked up the cereal he dropped only minutes ago.

"Oh man how do you not just love that woman?"

"Easily. She just threatened me."

"Oh Ty, only if you saw the world as I see it. Life would be so much easier. If I were in control all the time she wouldn't even have to threaten you! You would be on board with her no matter what. Now if you let me take over, just until after that whole get together thing, you could have whatever relationship you want with Joshy..just not with Joshy. But with a hot chick with daddy issues! So what do you say? Let me take over for a bit?"

"Don't call me that and you know the answer."

Tyler thought about how he knew Lana wasn't good news from day one but to think she really was gonna blackmail him for whatever she wanted was really shocking. "You have no choice. Everyone will see you as a joke if she tells everyone your little affair with Josh. Plus even if they are too scared to make fun of you, what's stopping them from making fun of  our Joshy? He is in as much danger as you are, Ty," Blurry said as if he was Tyler's friend trying to give good, thoughtful advise.

Once he brought up Josh, Tyler was in complete agreement with Blurryface. He was stuck doing whatever Lana told him to do as long as she wanted. Somehow even after that, Tyler couldn't bring himself to not like Lana. She had this way about her that made you have full trust in her. Sure she had something over Tyler but strangely enough, Tyler most likely would do anything Lana told him to do even if she didn't have blackmail.

Though he didn't know much about her, he felt like she wasn't this way just because. She was like a pure and innocent princess at one point but due to cruel circumstances, she became a lonely and selfish queen. She had no real place to call home and no true place of sanctuary. Somehow Tyler felt like he related to her on a level. Funny enough, though Tyler didn't know it, Lana felt like he would understand her more than anyone. She saw something in Tyler no one else did, she knew he understood her too.  They both had wars going on in their heads but kept up the appearance that they knew what they were doing. Their masks that showed proud and heartless beauties actually hid away the reality of depressed and scared kids who grew up too quickly.

"So much pain hiding behind such a confident face," she said to herself while driving home, "Oh Mr. Joseph, I'm gonna hang on to you as long as you allow me. You truly are the man I have been waiting for my whole life."