What is this feeling? (Marianas Trench FanFic)

Chapter 23 I Did It Again

As I get in the bus the driver closes the door behind me and starts the engine.

"Is our tour mate finally here?" A voice asks quietly.

"Yeah I'm here" I say in the same quiet tone.

I start walking to where the voice is coming from.

"Matty?!" I ask as he turns around

"Alli!! He says while giving me a hug.

"Everyone else is sleeping. Josh wanted to stay up and greet the guest but I told him he needed sleep." Matt says.

I just nod. I'm not in the mood to see Josh right now.

"I'm gonna head to bed. Ill show you where your bunk is" Matt says.

He starts walking so I follow him.

"Here it is" he whispers while pulling back the curtain.

"Night" I say while giving him a hug.

"Night" he says while climbing in the bunk across from mine.

I got the bathroom and change into a baggy long sleeve pullover sweater and shorts. I use the washroom and put my hair in a messy bun.

I go back in the bunk area and hop in my bunk and drift off to sleep.

When I wake up I notice a note on my forehead.

"We arrived. Gone in the building Simkin wanted to talk to us. Come in when you wake up. Josh still doesnt know your here. -Ian,Mike and Matt" I read aloud.

I pull on some shoes and head inside the building.

I can hear talking as I get closer to the room. I open the door, step inside and shut it behind me.

"Morning sleeping beauty" Mike says.

"It's burning hot in here why don't you take off the sweater" Ian says. I ignore what he says and look over at Matt who's holding out a coffee for me.

"Omg I love you" i say as I hug him then take the coffee. I look to the right and see Ian with his arms open. I take the hint and give him a hug.

"My turn" Mike says opening his arms.

I don't want to pull away from Mike. I know Josh. He's gonna want a hug.

I pull away from Mike and look blankly at Josh he opens his arms slightly. I walk over to him slowly.

He wraps his arms around me. I can feel him pulling me close to his body.

" I know what you did" he whispered as we pulled away.

I go and sit in the chair across the room.

"I called you all here today for something very important. A girl named Talia Castelleno is coming in. She's 13 years old and has had cancer for over half her life. " Jonathan begins.

"She hasn't been doing to we'll lately and nobody knows how much time she has left. She really looks up to Josh and Alli. It makes her happy seeing you guys together. I know you guys had a fallout but I need you guys to pretend your still together. Do it for Talia. She like PDA but keep in mind she's only 13"Jonathan says.

Mike, Matt and Ian leave the room leaving me, Josh and Jonathan alone.

"What'd you say?" Jonathan asks.

"I'll do it" Josh says.

I look down at the ground and hesitate. " for Talia" I say and smile weakly.

Jonathan pats the couch beside Josh and motions for me to go sit. I walk over and sit down awkwardly.

Josh wraps his arm around my shoulder and pulls me in closer while moving us hand down to my waist.

"That's a good start" Jonathan says. " now how about a hug and kiss"

We both stand up. Josh pulls me into a hug holding me as tightly as possible. I can tell he wants this.

I kiss his cheek hoping Jonathan says it okay.

"On the lips" Jonathan says.

Josh leans in and put its lips over mine. I kiss back. I have to admit I've missed this.

"Good now ill leave you two alone to practice" Jonathan says while walking out of the room.

Why's it so warm in here I think to myself. I wish I could just take this sweater off. I can feel the sweat on my face.

"Al. Maybe you should take the sweater off" Josh says noticing my sweat.

I would if I could. Believe me. I look down at the ground.

"No" I say softly.

"Did you..?" Josh asks.

I look down at my wrists.

Josh grabs my hands and rolls up my sleeves.

I stare at my wrists holding back tears. A tear escapes my eyes.

"Why would you do that to yourself again?" Josh asks while wiping my tears.

"I was triggered. It was because we weren't together." I choke out.

He brings my wrists up to his lips.

"What do you mean triggered?" Josh asks.

"I'll show you" I say while grabbing the laptop.

I click on Internet and log on to Twitter. I go to my mentions and show Josh the stuff people said and the pictures they sent.

"Al. I'm so sorry." Josh says softly.

"I can't believe Trenchers would do that. Especially after they know I used to do that." Josh started.

"I'm soo sorry. This is all my fault. I'm -" I cut him off by pressing my lips to his.

"Shh." I said as I pulled away.

Josh pulled me closer and put his arm around my waist. I rested my head on his shoulder.

"Josh.." I said looking up into his eyes.

"Can we get back together? Can we just take the engagement ring as a promise?" I ask.