Hetalia Feels

Thin Ice (S)

Warnings for: mental instability, loneliness, implied/referenced self harm, use of magic, loss of memory, depression, suicide by drowning, & the mourning of a lost loved one.
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     A tall man stood in the middle of an iced over pond, a small polar bear waving at him from the shore. He smiled maniacally, laughing a harsh, cruel laugh of absolute agony.

     Some might consider him crazy. But wouldn't you be the same if you had gone through all he had? Wouldn't you no longer find it in yourself to smile and laugh, to live life to the fullest?

     Now, the question remains. What had he gone through?

     A nightmare many people find themselves having is one of which their family and friends cannot remember who they are. It is a terrifying thing to experience, and most wake up crying.

     Now imagine that not being a dream. Imagine your own caretaker, your brother, everyone... Not knowing who you are. No matter how many times you remind them, they always forget soon after.

     Imagine celebrating your birthdays alone, only comforted by your razor. Imagine not even receiving an invitation to your siblings birthday a few days after.

     That was the life of the man on the pond. Canada. And he was fed up with it. Who wouldn't be?

     Canada was a damaged soul. Truly. He knew he would not survive, should he go through with this, and that another representation would take place. He knew this because he had an old spell book of England's, and had his own fair share of magic.

     No one had known... because no one remembered him.

     The polar bear kept waving at him from shore. "Don't do it!" He screamed. "I need to know who you are! Remind yourself, who are you?!"

     Canada smiled softly at the bear, showing the last bit of sanity he had. "I don't remember," he whispered.

     The sad thing was that he truly didn't. After so many years of struggling to remind others, to remind himself who he was, he had finally forgotten.

     And with that, he stomped on the ice with all of his might. The water rushed up, claiming him, as he locked eyes with Kumajirou.

     The last thing he ever heard before ice covered his view of the world was a scream, a scream of all the loss that you can experience.

      But it wasn't just Kumajirou, screaming. America was screaming too.

     Canada smiled, not minding the cold at all. In fact, he relished the stinging of ice on skin. He loved the embrace of death, the death that was so near.

     So he closed his eyes, and died.

     Another representation took over. A new Canada. One who never had to experience the pain and loneliness of being forgotten.

     America could never look this new Canada in the eyes. He didn't eat. He didn't talk. He was never the same.

     Because losing family is bad enough. But realizing that you were the reason they died all along made it much, much worse.

     If only they could take it all back.

     But they couldn't. For once something has been lost, it can never again be regained.

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     Sorry for the sucky chapter! I rewrote this multiple times, trying to get it the best it could be, but I feel like I made it worse. I still have writers block, and requests are still closed, but I finally got into the mood to write something so I wrote this request. Next will be Romano's. Requested by Proud_bookworm372 ! I hope you enjoyed. So... Good? Bad? Meh? Bai~

~Weirdanimewriter out!

Characters: Canada, Kumajirou, & America