Choices Between Us

Chapter 15

Harry's POV

       I lay awake in my room,  it is half past eight in the am.   I stretch my achy muscles and roll onto my side.  I look at the little figure next to me, her hair is a mess upon her pillow, her little mouth agape and breathing softly.  I love watching her sleep, she is the most precious thing I have ever laid eyes on.  I loved this little one with everything my heart had.  She was such an extraordinary little girl.  She was goofy, smart and curious as hell about everything around her.  She was sensitive and had so much love for everyone.  She was stubborn as hell, just like her mother, smart as well.   Which was a trait that wasn't passed along from me.  I reach my hand over and touch her face softly, she doesn't move.   I smile at her.

I was blessed that is for sure,  I had a beautiful daughter and a amazing little boy who wasn't much older than Lena.   I didn't get to see him as often as Lena.  Raya made sure I was really active in her live.  Sara was pissed at me for divorcing her.   I just couldn't take being in a loveless relationship.  I had pushed through it for four years before I had enough.  I wanted her to stay in London but she went back to LA, which was on the opposite coast from Lena.   Her still being in NYC.  I did get to talk on the phone often with my son.

I just never got over my love I had for Raya, she still made my heart flip, my stomach in knots,  she made me crazy because she was the vain to my existence.  I tried to date six months after my divorce but my every thought was on Raya, she was the love of my life.  She would always be.  I had lost her though, even though Niall or her would admit it to me, but they were involved.  I just knew it.  Deep down in my soul.  Niall never dated, never hooked up.   Always flying to New York when we had time off.  He would say Haz we are just friends.   I didn't believe it for a moment.   How can you just be friends with that woman.  She was amazing and beautiful.

"Good Morning Daddy."

I hear a little sleepy voice beside me, interrupting me from my thoughts.  I watch her yawn and rub her little eyes as she sits up.

"Sleep well Princess?"

"Oh the best Daddy.....your big bed is so soft and comfy.   I just love it.  It feels like a cloud.  Don't you think Daddy?"

"It is quite comfortable isn't it."

"Oh it is so comfy.   Like a big fluffy cloud.   Do you think clouds are really fluffy?"

"uhhhhh they look to be princess."

" Well Daddy to be perfectly honest clouds are clouds are created from the water that evaporates from water on the ground, they can make rain or snow.  So I don't think they would be really fluffy Daddy, they just look that way.  Did you know that Daddy?  Mommy told me one day and I remembered it all."

"You are smart just like your mommy." Harry said getting out of bed and stretching again.  "Are you hungry?"

"I am famished."

I raise and eyebrow at her.  "Famished?"  She had such big words for a five year old.

"Oh Daddy." She giggles rolling her eyes.  "It means hungry.......Silly Daddy."

I watch her climb across my bed and jump out.  She proceeds out of the room before me.  I follow her.  I shake my head at her and chuckle to myself.

"I want pancakes Daddy."  She tells me as we descend down the stars and into the kitchen.  I watch her climb up onto one of the bar stools that are sat at the island.  "With strawberries and whipped cream and the white sugar......you know what I mean Daddy?"

"Yes Princess I do.  You like the Icing sugar on them as well." 

"I love your pancakes.....you know Mommy isn't a very good cook.  She tries but she always messes things up Daddy.  Uncle Kyle cooks some when he comes over, did you know Aunt Jenny, his wife has a baby in her belly.   I asked mommy about how the baby got there and she said it was magic."

"She did? Did she?"

"Is it true Daddy.  Did I come from magic.  Do you have a magic wand that you waved and put me in Mommy's belly."  Lena says just as I take a big drink of my coffee.  I choke and almost spit it out,  her idea of me having a wand.

"Sure." I laugh......trying to not think about the whole making a baby situation and her analogy on it.  "A wand though?" I ask raising an eyebrow.  "Pretty cool isn't it?"

"If you think so.  I think babies cry to much and they stink.  They just sit there, kinda boring I think."

"You were far from boring Princess." I tell her as I make her breakfast.   I tell her little stories of how amazing she was as a baby.  Told her how she would always spit up on Uncle Louis, which she thought was awful because Louis was her favorite person, he spoiled her rotten.  What ever she wanted, Louis would make sure she had it.

We ate our pancakes, she tried to be quiet and not talk with her mouth full, which was a very hard task for her.  She was talking from the time her eyes opened in the morning till she went to sleep or got interested in something that would keep her quiet for a few minutes.

She bounced off to the living room while I cleaned up the kitchen,  Once I finished up with my chore of making the kitchen the way it was before I started to make us breakfast.  I told my little one I was going to have a quick shower.   I made sure the alarm was set and that she couldn't open the front door as it was locked.

She just smiled at me and told me she was watching TV and not to bother her anyway.  It was important as she was watching a learning show about wild baby animals.   Which for sure would be a topic of conversation for the rest of the day.

I went up to my room, showered quickly.   I didn't linger in there like I usually did as I was worried about Lena, I knew she was fine but still worried.   I got dressed in my black jeans and a tshirt with a long sleeve button up.  It was a typical London spring day, even though the sun was shinning it was chilly outside.  How I missed the warmth of LA.

As I was getting ready to head back down stairs my mobile phone rang.  I glanced down seeing Raya's name flash across the screen.  Made my heart leap to my throat and the thousand butterflies that reside in my gut come alive.

"Good Morning." I say as I answer.

"Hi Harry." Her voice rings sweet in my ear.   I relish the sound of my name falling from her lips.  "How was the night?  How is Lena doing?"

"We had fun.  Movies and junk food and her telling me a thousand stories."

"Junk food?"

"Yes we had chocolate."

"Not to much I hope.  I really don't like her to have a lot of sugar."

"Raya it is fine.  She is fine.  Sugar in moderation is okay.  Even though we are going out to lunch with Louis today, he may give her more than I have thought of giving her."

"Harry it makes her more hyper."

"I will keep it to a minimal, I promise."

I hear her sigh.  Oh I missed that sound.  "Okay well tell her  I love her.   I will see her tomorrow for a little bit right?   I thought maybe  I could take her to the park.  Do you think you could arrange security for us.  I know at home I don't worry about it, but here in London if the paps know she is here with you.  You just never know."

"I will for sure.   Why dont I come with you.  I would love to take her to the park too."

"I don't know if that is a good idea Harry."

"Raya it would be good to do things as a family.  We are friends now right?'

"Ya I guess."

"Well good than.  I will see you tomorrow afternoon." I smile and disconnect the call.  I would make sure I was my charming self.   I wanted to make her remember why she fell in love with me.   Lena would be also really excited that we were doing things as a family.   I couldn't wait.