Choices Between Us

Chapter 16

"You sure you don't want me to come? Ya know for moral support." Niall asked sitting on the bed watching me brush out my hair. 

"I will be fine Niall." I smile at him in the mirror, his blue eyes meet mine.  He gives me a small grin.  I can tell it is forced and he is clearly upset about something.

"If you say so." He says as he stands up and comes to stand behind me.  He rest his chin on my shoulder.  "We still on for dinner tonight?"

"Yes......ofcourse." I turn and face him, his hands rest on my hips.

"You know we have to stop pretending sometime that we are just friends.   I don't know how everyone is going to take it.....but I want you to myself all the time Raya."

I smile at him.  "I am not sure I can even admit it to myself Naill.   I mean we have been "just friends for a very long time."  I reach up and brush his longer hair back from his face.  "Until just recently."

He grins at me and kisses my lips softly.  "Mmmmm that was pretty amazing."

"It was nice." I say between kisses, I pulled back from his embrace.  I wonder if he could tell I was holding back.  I didn't mean to hold back but I couldn't help it.   I put my coat on and pick my purse up off of the bed.  "I will see you later."

Niall groans and pulls me back to him.  "Do you have  to go?"

"Ummmm yes my child is waiting." I laugh trying to get out of his grasp but he holds me tighter.

"Okay......I will survive." He says as he gives me a soft kiss on the lips.  "I love you." he tells me sincerely.  I never doubted his love me in the least, he has loved me for very long time. 

"I will call you when I need you to send the car."

"Okay.......I will miss you." he tells me as I make my way to the door.

"Miss you too." I say lastly as I head out through the door.  It closes behind me.  I lean against it for a moment trying to clear my head.  I close my eyes and take a deep breath and sigh.  What the hell was I doing.   Sleeping with Naill and taking our friendship to something I swore I would never cross as I was still in love with Harry, would always be in love with Harry.   Was I ever going to be with Harry again, No i made that clear to myself many years ago when he chose Sara over me,  I didn't even care that they were no longer together.  He would no doubtfully have another woman in his life soon.

Did I love Niall?  Yes I did......I loved him dearly.   He was so good to Lena and I.   So why should I feel this way, like I betrayed Harry when I haven't in the least.  This was good for me.   Niall was good for me.  I turn around and open the door and go back inside his place.

"Back so soon." He says smiling at me from across the room.   I walk over to him and kiss him, really kiss him.  I pull back breathless to see his eyes twinkle and smile huge. "Wow......missed me that quickly."

"I love you." I tell him before I peck his lips one last time.  "Now I have to go."

I rush out,  the car was waiting for me.

The drive across the city of London was always amazing to me.  I really loved this place.  I don't know why I hadn't relocated yet.  My parents were never around much, and Kyle was busy with is wife and a new baby on the way.  All of the important people in Lena's life were here in this city or close by.  Maybe I would think more on it,  I didn't work anymore.  I had enough money from my trust fund that I never had to worry about money.  Harry did help out with Lena......even though I didn't take monthly amounts from him, like he wanted me too.  I told him just be a dad, give her what she wants and needs within limits.