Struggles In The Dark (A Carl Grimes Fanfiction)

The Past

Carl's P.O.V
We've been traveling for a week now. I can tell Luke is getting annoyed that we haven't found a place to live yet. Luke suggested not leaving the state. I was confused by this at first, but I think I'm starting to figure it out. He's scared we might end up traveling toward his home, the one he used to know before the world took a turn for the worst. He's a very private person when it comes to his life before everything happened. He won't speak about what happened to his parents, not even to me. And on top of that, we're out of food. We only have a bottle of water left.

"Luke, I really do think we should leave the state."

"No, let's stay here."

"This state reminds me of Alexandria and my dad. North or south?"

He rolls his eyes at me.

"If we absolutely have to leave, I'd rather go north."

"Why not south?"

He stops walking and stares me down.

"Why not north? I don't like the south."

"I'm from the south, Luke. And I know you are too. The faint accent gives it away. Why won't you go home?"

"Why would I? There's nothing there for me. Everyone I once knew is dead. I'd rather remember South Carolina for what it was, not as it is."

"I'm from Kentucky. Look, now we're learning something about each other. Have you realized how we barely know anything about each other?"

"Yeah, I have."

"And you still don't want to talk about it, do you?"

"Nope. I'm sorry, Carl."

"Yeah. That's what I thought."

"Don't get an attitude. My past isn't important."

"I just don't understand why you won't talk about it."

"I don't like to dwell on the past! Is it really that important to tell you that I watched my mom get torn apart right in front of me and that my dad shot himself so he wouldn't have to live without her?! He abandoned me! Me! His only kid! In a world like this! He left me all alone! I'm so freaking sorry I don't like to talk about it!"

He's shaking like crazy, his face has turned red from the yelling too. It's obvious that he's fighting back the memories.

"I'm sorry, Luke. I didn't know."

"Well now you do."

I know now why being alone scares him. The one person he trusted to never leave him left him. Maybe he's scared I'll leave him alone too. Maybe that's why he's afraid to share things with me. Maybe he's afraid of scaring me away.

"Let's find shelter. We both need sleep," I say.

"Yeah, sounds good," he replies quietly.