sunshine ☆彡 seokmin

one

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www.thenicestplaceontheinter.ten|
www.thenicestplaceontheinter.te|
www.thenicestplaceontheinter.t|
www.thenicestplaceontheinter.|
www.thenicestplaceontheinter.net

          "LONELY, LONELY, LONELY WHALE," A voice belts out and I hit the pause button immediately, a bit furious at how my music played the one song I didn't need at the moment. I trusted Pandora, but now I don't know anymore. I mean, I don't even know what I'm listening to.

My laptop is about to die but I don't care. The only thing that I want in this unforgivable world is just not to feel so lonely anymore. Yeah, probably sounds pathetic, but it means so much more.

It's going to school every single fricking day and not saying one word or being acknowledged. It's having literally no friends or anyone, even out of school, to rely on. It's having no one in your life. It's feeling like you're not even alive; you're just an incredibly lonely, lost soul, watching humanity from your own hollowed eyes.

My mouth is forming a nasty frown as a small sound begins to escape my chapped and bloodied lips. And, they're sobs, which echo right off my undecorated walls.

My vision gets as blurry as when I don't have my glasses on but I actually do have my glasses on. It's just that tears are being annoying and welling up in my eyes. I don't blame my tears; I'd want to run out of me, too, you know?

I was on Tumblr and one of the art blogs that I follow mentioned something about The Nicest Place On The Internet. My curiosity got the best of me because I don't think I've ever had the chance to call anyone or anything 'nice'. No one has ever been that way to me.

The page is loading, apparently, so I find that this is the good time to try and blink my tears away. That is, until the page is actually done loading.

At first, I'm a bit scared, watching a man, in perhaps his 50's, walk around, but then he stops. My arms constrict around myself as he gives a big smile to me, or the camera, and runs to me.

I gotta admit, my heart pounds violently in my chest because this seems kind of odd, but he hugs the camera and when he pulls away, he blows a kiss. My tears return.

There are hearts around the ever-changing screen and I feel strange. The next person is a girl with red hair and thick, rectangular glasses, who smiles sweetly at the camera before reaching in to give it a hug. My mouth wants to close; to quiet down the sobs pouring out of my mouth but I can't. I feel sad yet relieved yet hopeful yet like screaming at the top of my lungs.

The screen changes to an older woman with beautiful, dark skin and brown eyes. She grins and gives the camera a visibly big hug, pressing it to her the surface of her jean jacket. My fingers tremble and sweat way too much so I continue rubbing them down my sweats.

More hearts swim around the page and my arms begin to wrap themselves around my own body, slightly feeling the emotion through the vacuum, which is called the Internet.

The screen changes to a little boy with thinning, blonde hair and bright green eyes. He grins, giving me the pleasurable view of the gap in his teeth. His thin arms wrap around the camera, for quite a while, and I, myself, 'do not want to let go'.

The page buffers and I quickly let out a sob before I see the next person on my computer screen. It's three guys, which is the only thing I can make out through my blurring vision.

I wipe my eyes, wanting to look them in the eyes and remember them for who they are because whomever they are; the already mean a lot to me.

But once I blink the tears, that are now tracing their way down my round cheeks, I see three boys with lovely monolids and wavy hair.

The one with cheeks almost as round as mine blows kisses at the screen, and I nearly blush. Nearly. The one with obviously-dyed blonde hair waves both hands and occasionally makes hearts with his hands. I wish he could see that I feel the same way to him.

The one with the brightest smile that I have ever seen on this damned plant grins, closing his eyes, and raising a sign that I will probably memorize.

In red crayon, the sign reads, "Smile more, sunshine! The world needs the light of your existence!" He waves it around in circles and makes the funniest faces I have ever seen, earning a giggle, which fused itself with a sob.

And then, they widen their eyes before running to the camera and wrapping their arms around it. I'm crying again, and I feel all the love that I never felt, even if no one is physically giving it to me. Love is real.

They pass the camera around and give it kisses, blurring the screen. I smile and cry at the same time, watching them wave once more until the screen cuts.

My heart aches to see them once more, but it also feels as if a weight has been liberated from my chest. Like I can actually breathe or something.

Just when I catch a glimpse of the next person; a boy with a bandana and mess of freckles, the screen shuts off. The hum of the power from my laptop quiets down until there's no noise at all. My laptop just died.

I groan and slam my hand against my phone, causing it to accidentally play again. It's another song now, something with an acoustic melody but lovely, crisp voice. It's not English, just like the last song.

I throw myself back onto the squeaky mattress and let out a relieved sigh, half-smiling at the image of those three boys, whom I want to repay. The images of those adorable boys burn bright in my head, just as symbolic as they are to me.

"Butterfly, like a Butterfly
machi Butterfly, bu butterfly cheoreom..." The voices sing to me as I drift off, for once, to peaceful sleep.