The Wrong Misfit

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5 solid years. No phone calls. No messages or emails. No hand-written letters in the mail. Nothing. And there he was, begging for forgiveness, believing that now was the right time to come back when he should've never left, never left me in particular. The main question that went through my head was "Why? Why now? Why here?"

I stepped out and closed the door behind me on the porch, desperately wanting to know what his intentions were at the time.

"What the hell do you want Ed?"

"I just wanted to say hello."

"Bullshit. You haven't said a word to me for 5 years and you show up after I get kicked out. Perfect timing."

"You got kicked out?"

"If you were around, you would know what happened. Long story short, I got arrested for stealing something I didn't steal and now have to do 11 damn months of community service. Not to mention, my mother kicked me out."

"Woah..."

"Yeah, woah... How'd you know I'd be here?"

"Your mum told me."

"You went to see her?" I asked in disbelief.  "What did she say?"

"When I asked where you were, she said you were going to be staying at a friend's house while she was away on a business trip."

"Liar..."

"Who are you staying with?"

"My friend Simon, who just so happens to be doing community service with me...you and I both know that you're here not to talk about my feelings so spit it out. Why are you here?"

He was silent for a few seconds, mustering up the courage to confess. "Dad wants you to come back home." I hadn't seen him in months. He lived in England before moving to the states and married my mom. But after the marriage failed, he fled back to England and I stayed with my mom. For reasons I still don't know, we moved over here, I guess in hopes of just starting over. However she never let me visit him. As emotionless as I may have seemed, I missed him. Even if he wasn't my biological father. 

"Dad...I haven't seen  him in a long time. Is he... good?"

"Yeah. He's good. He talks about you a lot, wishing that his 'baby girl' would come visit him. He's been so depressed lately..." He's been calling me that ever since I was young.

"How come you're just now telling me this? Why hasn't he called? And I thought you were on tour."

"I am still on tour but I visit him every now and again. And he said he accidentally got rid of your phone number." That's a complete lie because he knows it by heart.

"...is his number still the same?" Ed nodded. "...how come you haven't spoken to me in so long?"

He was nervous and confused, obvious by the way he was standing. "I...I don't know to be completely honest."

"Ever since you've been in the limelight, you've forgotten about me."

"That's not true. I thought about you every day, hoping that you were ok-"

"Then why didn't you come to see for yourself?" By then I was getting angry. "My number hasn't changed. You know my email address." I let a single tear escape the corner of my eye and looked down in embarrassment. I hate crying in front of other people. "I missed you. I needed you and you weren't there." I sat down in one of the two chairs that resided on the porch and cupped my face in my hands, waiting for the rest of the inevitable tears to come. He put his hood down and kneeled in front of me. He pulled my hands away and looked me in the eyes; I noticed how sleepy he looked. I noticed how gutted, how remorseful he felt. I was angry with him but with one look in his eyes, I knew that he was sincerely sorry, regretting every second he let go by without checking up on me. Without he even saying it, he knew what he did was hurtful, after all the years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds, and moments he went without making sure that the person who loved him most still had love left to give, still was given the love she needed in the whirlwind of a life she lived.