Spinning around again

Chapter 20

Today is Friday and I have no plans, so I woke still on the sofa at around 6am. With a sore back and stiff neck. Groaning I got up slowly and made my way into the kitchen turning the coffee machine on and leaned against the fridge sleepily. I felt so drained. Then I made myself a crazily milky coffee and walked back into the living room. All this time thinking about my job. Don't get me wrong I like my job, in fact sometimes I'd even say I love it but with Jack not working and me going into maternity leave I had to do something but I couldn't think what. What would fit in around me? Plopping myself down on the sofa I thought about having a business at home. Something that would make enough money for everything. I know Kate had offered to help with everything but I wanted to do something, I needed to do something or I'd go insane. Crazy in fact. I thought about what I enjoyed doing. Singing, art, clothing design. I really enjoyed those things. A crazy idea popped into my head, I could make clothes and sell them have my own website and office and everything! I could also sell art, my art. Obviously I'd have to stay in work until it took off but I really liked that idea. A lot. I pulled out a piece of paper, grabbed my laptop and set to work. I wrote down everything i would need to do. How much things would cost. Then I went on some website and found out how to start a business that would stay open as long as I wanted. By the time 8 o clock came round and Kate and Jack got up. I had piles and piles of bugs of paper, several tea and coffee cups and crazy ideas running around. I'd called work told them I'd been in today and then also Monday,Tuesday, Thursday and next Friday. I was going to do this, with the help of friends or not. Kate walked lazily into the living room munching on a bit of toast.
"Did you get any sleep?" She asked
"Yeah." I replied scribbling more ideas down
She raised her eyebrows but didn't say a word and sat down picking up a bit of paper and skim read it.
"What's this about?" She asked
"Oh I want to start my own clothing and art business." I replied casually
Kate laughed
"Ok then sweetie." She didn't think I could
"What?" I said
Kate shook her head and held her hands up defensively
"If you don't think I can do it just say!" I replied
"Elsa baby , I didn't mean that. I mean I've seen you do this before and... Well it's never gone anyway." She mumbled
"Yeah well now I have a child to support and it's not like Jacks gonna help is it?!" I said
There was silence for second and Kate said
"Is that what Yesterday was all about?" She asked
"Kate I have no clue what your on about. Can I not invite my best friend over for dinner?"
Kate sighed
"Elsa, last night it felt like you and Gavin where a couple and we where the two friends coming for diner." Kate said softly
"Well I did try!" I said grumpy and went to walk off but Kate grabbed my arm and pulled me back down then she held onto my arm so I couldn't run off
"I don't know what's up with you right now ok? But I'm going to try be understanding alright. I know your a bit sensitive at the moment but stop doing that. Elsa you know I love and I'd go to the moon to save you if need be and yes sometime I say the wrong thing but I will always love you ok?" She said gently
"I know last night you tried, you tried a lot harder then me or Jack did ok? But you've got to understand Jacks trying too." Kate said defending him
"Trying what?" I asked "He does nothing! Nothing at all! Just mops around the house and sometimes goes out shopping when I drag him! He isn't trying to do anything!" I snapped
Kate sighed once more
"I don't know what to say to you." She mumbled "Last night I watched you, I saw how you liked Gavin's compliments and how you where a lot happier around him. Does Jack not show how much he loves you? Do I not? Is that what it is?"
"Yes." I mumbled not looking at her
"Yes to what sweetie?"
It was my turn to sign
"Have you even seen Jack compliment me? Or say he loves me? Not for a very long time. Relationship work both ways Kate and I'm the only one pulling. I feel like he doesn't even want to be here sometime." I admitted thought I wasn't really sure where that came from. I mean it was true but I hadn't meant to tell her that.
"Then tell him." Kate said softly
I looked at her with a look that said are you nuts
"Kate he didn't even look at me last night."
She smiled sadly
"He's jealous."
"Oh so I'm not allowed to have friends so he can be happy?!" I snapped
Kate sighed and sucked in deeply
"Sorry." I mumbled
Kate shook her head and gave a small laugh and leaned out to hug me.
"Love you, never forget that. Ever." She whispered
When we pulled apart she grinned at me.
"So what I'm doing in this new job?"
"Nothing." I said giggling