All of the Lights

Chapter Twenty-One

Previously...

"Thank you." I whispered to him, giving in to his love. I was depressed. I was mentally torn apart. I was suicidal. However, I wasn't a mean witch. I couldn't make myself not respond to Sam's love. I needed him and he needed me. Sometimes we're far away from each other... But other times, we're practically overlapping.

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Chapter Twenty-One

"I got you two lovebirds breakfast." Jake quietly entered our room. He was holding a tray with plates on top. Sam groaned and shifted positions.

"Mm... Smells good." Sam mumbled, pulling me closer to him. I opened my eyes slowly and smiled at Jake.

"Thanks." I said sleepily.

"No, thank you... Seriously." Jake nodded his head, placing the tray on a small coffee table.

"Man, I owe you." Sam thanked. He pulled himself out of bed and looked at the tray.

"Don't worry about it, bro. Just relax." Jake smiled, giving Sam a fist pump. He walked out of the room and left us alone.

"That's nice of him." I pulled myself up on the bed.

"Hell yeah. I just wish he didn't wake me up. That was literally the best I've slept in a long time." Sam picked up a piece of bacon and placed it between his teeth. He walked back towards the bed with the tray of food in his hands.

"Alright, baby... Eat up." He handed me a plate of food. My stomach turned at the sight.

Ugh.

The plate was full of eggs, bacon and pancakes. Just looking at it made me full.

Take a step forward. Keep going forward. You're getting better.

I watched Sam scarf down the food in front of him. He stopped and looked at me, noticing that I was watching him.

"The eggs are healthy for you." His dull voice was back.

Dammit.

"I know. I'll eat them." I nodded at my plate.

I can't ruin this. We were doing so great.

I picked up my fork and bit into my eggs.

Chew, chew, swallow.

I continued this pattern until my eggs were gone. Sam's plate was empty by the time I had finished my eggs. He leaned back on the bed and watched me.

"I'm full. You want the rest?" I handed him my plate. He shook his head, his happy eyes now fading. Sam was dead. I was dead. We both knew how to live, yet we chose not to. We kept letting ourselves fall into the depression.

"Ok..." I responded. I pulled myself up, took Sam's plate, and walked towards the door.

"Riley?" Sam called. I turned around, raising my eyebrows.

"Last night... Uh..." He started.

Oh great. I know where this is going.

"Did you... You know... Cut yourself again?" He managed to spit out. I shook my head no. Sam gave me a small smile. He looked as if he wanted to say something else, but he didn't. So, I walked out to the kitchen with the dirty plates.

Cody was sitting at the table, laughing about something with Jake. When I walked in, they both went silent.

"You must've got it in last night, huh? No way Sam could be so happy otherwise." Cody teased. I set my plate in the sink and turned to him.