Her Princess Charming

Wake Me Up

'LYSS!' Someone yelled before  everything faded to black.

-

I struggled to adjust my vision to the brightness that beamed at me as I opened my eyes.

Am I already in heaven? I couldnt be right. People who kill themselves dont go to heaven for all I know.

'She's awake! She's awake! Call the nurses!' I could hear them shuffling around me. There couldnt be nurses in heaven.

It was that moment when I realized, I was in the hospital and I didnt die. It wasnt heaven or hell or purgatory and my plan failed. I somehow wished I took a bottle of medicine instead.

I didnt die.

It was disappointing but at the same time relieving. I couldnt quite understand my emotions. I just kept calm and quiet but something hurts.  My neck.

I ran my fingers across the part that hurt. It stung like I placed alcohol on a fresh wound.

A man, whom I suppose was a doctor, approached me and flashed a mini flashlight on my eyes. I was blinded for a minute or two. He also checked all the tubes and crap connected to my arm, telling my mom that it was good news.

My mom was panicking. She was half-laughing and half-crying as she nodded at the man.

'Oh god! Lyss, my daughter!' She hugged me and sobbed as she kept saying sorry over and over again. It irritated me for some reasons.

'Mom. Mom, it hurts.' I pushed her slightly when her hair was brushing against the scrapes on my neck. She moved away and held my hands.

'Im sorry.' She sobbed again. I looked away and glanced at my brothers. They were just staring at me as if I just resurrected from death.

And god. Allen was there too. He was the one who yelled my name before everything went to black. He was also the one who brought me to the hospital and called my family.

I stared up at the ceiling and closed my eyes. I didnt expect that I would still be here.

I didnt want to be here anymore and I had no idea how long I was in the hospital already.

'How long have I been here?'

'Nine hours.' My mom said as she wiped her tears.

'Nine hours?'

'Why did you do that?' She sobbed. I didnt say a word because it was no use explaining to anyone if I hadnt understood the reason myself.

'Lyss just please.. Help me understand..' She collapsed on the chair beside the hospital bed as she cried and my brothers hugged her.

'Im so sick of it all.' I muttered. 'You.. Dad.. Allen.. Juliana..' I felt so bad but the tears cannot come out. Theyre stuck somewhere unreachable and I couldnt get them out as much as I want to.

'You didnt have to do that!'

'Yeah I did.'

'No. Please dont do it again sweetie. Im begging you.' She almost knelt on the floor.

'Lyss.. Stop it.' Allen said.

'You didnt have to save me.'

'I had to.'

'You dont. You dont have to play the good part. Were done so many months ago. I dont even want to see you again. You gave me nothing but another chance to live this miserable life.'

I just closed my eyes and slept the pain away. I didnt entertain all the questions and crap because the more I accepted them, the more I felt worse about myself.