I'd Rather Be Black & Blue, Than Accept That You Withdrew | tronnor

Chapter Six

Troye was never a good liar. Whenever his mom would corner him and ask him for the truth, his face would always turn red and his voice would tremble and eventually she'd get him to tell her the truth.

Despite not being good at lying, he was good at hiding his emotions. He was just never good at opening up and letting someone in. His parents would always ask him to talk to them, to let them help him. But it was hard. He didn't like to feel vulnerable and he didn't like accepting help.

He was never good at standing up for himself either. He remembers that boy in the eighth grade who would always corner him whenever they were alone, words cutting him open like knives, hurting him more than fists ever could. Words always hurt him more.

He doesn't like to talk about Andrew. Whenever his parents would ask him about it, he'd always let out a soft laugh and say that they were just friends; and sometimes he'd find himself in his room crying because he wishes that they never met but at the same time he hopes that they won't lose what they have. Because who would ever put up with him? Who would deal with the strain of a long distance relationship while he lives his dreams?

Who would love him?

And his heart was so confused and it ached for an answer. An answer to what love really was.

×××

Troye was stressed. The whole reason he had flown out to LA was to discuss tour dates and where he'd be visiting. It was such an amazing feeling knowing that he'd be able to see his fans in the flesh. He's going to be able to hear them scream his lyrics and see their cute little faces. He was happy.

He tries to tell himself that it's not because he won't be able to see Andrew as much.

"Boo!" A playful voice whispered in his ear, soft hands grabbing his arms. Troye jumped and put his hands up to cover his face, body trembling. The voice giggled, making Troye peak from behind his hands to look at the friendly face. Connor frowned, eyes going soft and laugher dying down when he saw the trembles going through Troye's body. He put a gentle hand on Troye's arm, making his tense body relax. "Hey, I'm not going to hurt you." He reassured, voice soft and quiet. "I would never."

Troye swallowed the lump in his throat, nodding his head slowly. "I know." His voice trembled. "You just scared me, that's all." Connor raked his eyes over him, they made Troye feel naked under his gaze. Like everything was out in the open for him to see. Even if he did tell Connor about Andrew, he wouldn't care.

Because who would care.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked gently, hoping he'll get him to talk.

"Yeah, of course." Troye smiled reassuringly at Connor, praying that he'll let it go and stop pestering him.

But nothing gets past Connor.

"I wanted to talk to you about something." Connor stated, sitting down on the couch and looking up at Troye expectedly.

Troye cleared his throat, eyes nervously avoiding Connor's gaze. "Now?"

"Yes."

"Okay." Troye sat down next to Connor, eyes staring down into his lap. "What's up?"

"You've been lying to me."

Troye looked up quickly, eyes widening and heart racing. "Why do you think that?"

Connor sighed, shaking his head slightly. He opened his mouth, but closed it and sighed loudly. "Yesterday." Connor's voice trembled. "You said that those bruises were from playing around with Tyde." Troye nodded his head slowly.

"Yeah, they were. I told you I hit myself wi-"

"A table." Connor interuppted. "But then I asked again and you said a doorknob." Troye swallowed the lump in his throat.

"I don't know what you want me to say."

"The fucking truth, Troye!" Connor yelled, standing up from the couch and pacing the room. "Why are you lying to me? We've always been honest with each other." Connor's face was red, hands trembling and eyes bloodshot. Troye shivered. "You've changed so much since the last time I saw you. You're not you and that's scaring me. I don't even know who you are anymore." Connor turned to look at Troye, eyes softening. "Don't cry."

Tears were rolling down Troye's porcelain face, lip quivering as he sobbed quietly into his hands. His body was shaking as he curled in on himself. "I'm sorry."

Connor kneeled down on front of him, hands gently tugging at his thin arms covering his face. "Tell me what's going on." He managed to uncover Troye's face, softly gripping onto his cold and clammy hands. "Is someone hurting you?"

Troye shook his head quickly, making Connor flinch when he let out a loud sob.

"Troye, tell me the truth. So help me God, if someone is hurting you-"

"I don't want to talk about it."

So they didn't.