My Country Paradise

Chapter 7: With A Doubt

I walked through the crowd, eyes trained at my feet. Dark chuckles sounded beside me, and I couldn't help but wonder if they were laughing at me. I came into the cafeteria and sat down in my usual spot...by myself. Kids across the table stared at me and I kept my face down, munching quietly on my food, even though I had now lost my appetite. I heard them whispering..."Look at that freak!" "She's so weird!" "She doesn't fit in!" "She never will!" "Freak!" "Freak!"

I jolted from my sleep, my senses alert. My breath came in quick, deep rasps. "Freak!" The words echoed in my head, making me dizzy. I was a freak, wasn't I? This, Andrew, everything-- this was all a dream. He wasn't real. How could he be? I was a freak and he...he was so perfect. I rolled over onto my side and pulled the quilt tighter around my body, wanting to disappear. What was I thinking? Andrew could never love me. I lifted up a pillow and shoved it over my head angrilly. I screamed into the soft pillow and silent tears rained down with a fierce steadiness, leaving a trail of sadness down my cheek in its wake. Even through the pillow I could hear the steady, harmonious chirping of the crickets. How could they go on singing when everything is going so wrong? I forced my eyes shut and willed myself into a deep sleep, hoping never to wake up again.

Soft light streamed on my face, the warmth waking me. I blinked the sleep from my eyes and propped myself up on my elbow. I thought about the past days events and how there was no way they could be true. Even though I had no want to, I stood and got ready for the day. After I had finished I walked into the kitchen. Aunt Darcy was busily preparing breakfast.

"Good mornin' Alli. I made breakfast burritos." She smiled at me from behind the bar.

"Mmm," I smiled, licking my lips. I made myself one, stuffing it full of sausage and scrambled eggs. I began munching on it quietly when the door creaked open. All of the sudden, I felt arms wrap around my waist and I blushed, knowing exactly who it was.

His whisper sent a chill all the way to the soles of my feet, "Good morning, sunshine." Hold on. Was I dreaming again? I felt Aunt Darcy's gaze and blushed further, attempting to hide it behind my hands. Andrew pulled them away from my face and swiveled my stool so I was facing him. "Come on, I have something to show you." His smile was warm, causing butterflies to flutter in my stomach.

"O-okay," I stuttered. He grabbed my hands and pulled me out the door. I looked for the cows, but they were no where in sight.

"Come on. This way," Andrew said, guiding me to the gator. He helped me into the pasenger side, but I stood up and scooted to the drivers side.

"My turn," I smirked, laughing softly. Andrew got into the passenger seat reluctantly.

"Alright, just don't kill me."

"Hey!"

"I'm joking! I'm joking!" he chuckled, lifting his hands in surrender. I started the engine and pulled out onto the gravel road.

"Which way?" I looked to the left, which led to the barn, and then to the right, which led deeper into the trees. Andrew signalled to the right and I followed his instruction. After a few more turns, which led deeper into the territory-- the trail had a lot of bumps, not to mention-- we stopped. I looked around and spotted the cows, munching on tall grass between a couple of trees. Andrew, being his usual self, helped me out of the gator. We walked slowly towards them, grass crunching between our feet with each step. The bull stepped away from us and revealed a baby, nestled against its mother's side. The mother, a large cow with a white speckled face mooed at us uncertaintly.

"It's okay, we won't hurt your baby," I cooed softly, kneeling down beside her. "Oh, what a sweet baby." I smiled down at the calf, who looked nearly identical to his mother. His ears twitched and he reached his snout up to sniff me curiously. His mother nuzzled him closer to her, farther away from me. I just watched quietly as Andrew kneeled down beside me.

"Beautiful, huh?" I nodded quickly, looking at him with an amazed expression. His eyes softened, and I nearly blushed again but I contained myself.

"What is his--" Suddenly, a terrible moan came from in front of me and I saw Lilly pacing in distress. Her hooves pawed at the ground and she cried out again. "Andrew, what's wrong? Is she having her baby?" Andrew nodded, atempting to move towards Lilly.

"Something's not right," he mumbled to himself. My heart began to beat faster. When Lilly saw Andrew coming closer she backed away, mooing warningly. Her sides heaved and sweat trickled down her black coat.

"Alli, I can't get close enough to her, but you might be able to!" Andrew shouted back towards me and I nodded shakily, rising to my feet. I stood beside Andrew, holding out my hand and slowly moving forward.

"It's alright, girl," I whispered softly. "I won't hurt you, I just want to help." I continued to mumble softly to her. It didn't matter what I said, she just needed to hear my voice. Lilly looked at me warily, but stopped backing up. "That's it. Easy now." I continued to move forward and she lowered her head, signalling her defeat. I approached her quietly, hand still out stretched. She was panting heavilly and she let out a painful moan. I looked back at Andrew. "W-what do I do?"

"Try to ease her down on her side," Andrew's calm voice soothed me. I wrapped my arms around her neck and tugged down gently. Lilly followed my lead and knelt down on the dusty ground. I continued to guide her until she was on her side. "Okay, I'm going to try to approach her now, Alli. Keep her calm. She likes you." I simply nodded, talking quietly to Lilly. Her ears twitched as she listened to my soft voice. Andrew approached from behind me. He layed a hand on my shoulder reasuringly before kneeling down next to me. He put his ear to her side and listened. His face paled a notch. "The baby's in distress." I looked down and saw the baby's legs had appeared. I looked back at Andrew worriedly. "I'll have to help pull the baby," he said, more to himself than me. I wrapped my arms around Lilly's neck and laid there, knowing I would have to hold her down as best as I could. Lilly cried out and I clenched my eyes shut, not wanting to see her in distress. I heard the thump of the baby onto the soft earth and opened my eyes. Lilly lay exausted in the dirt, her breath deep and heavy. I looked back at Andrew and smiled. My smile dimmed when I saw him pacing, his hands ruffling through his hair. He looked down at the baby. The calf didn't move, it lay completly still. I looked for the rise and fall of its chest, but found none. It was dead. Andrew looked to be at a breaking point. I stood up quickly and walked over to him. He continued to pace until I laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, Alli." His hands shook and he looked at me, a deep sorrow contained in his brown eyes. I reached over and hugged him, surprised by my actions. He let out a deep sigh and I hugged him tightly, not ever wanting to let go.

I laid my head against his chest, mumbling softly. "You did the best you could Andrew. It's okay. It's okay." He pulled away and managed a weak smile in my direction.

"Thanks, Alli. You're the best." I smiled back at him. Maybe this wasn't a dream.