.:Zodiac Horoscopes:.

f i f t y - s e v e n

The Signs on a Saturday Night:

Aries: Probably shitfaced at a rock concert beating people up

Taurus: Listening to music and sipping tea, possibly crying to exaggerative pop punk

Gemini: Either out too late talking about their feelings or on the phone at 3 am

Cancer: Drawing a picture or taking a nap

Leo: In some parking lot with hoards of people trying multiple times to make everyone laugh

Virgo: Laying in bed with an old laptop contemplating life and checking social media

Libra: In a friend's attic (but by the outlet so they can charge their phone and use it at the same time)

Scorpio: Sitting in the corner of a wild party wondering when they get to go home

Sagittarius: Going on a midnight drive or to explore an alleged "haunted location"

Capricorn: Either finishing homework ahead of time so they don't have to do it later or shopping

Aquarius: Protesting, rioting, supporting local theater, or sitting on the floor eating a bagel

Pisces: Either asleep, drunk, or playing with a dog