To the Beach

Chapter 36

🌹Cascade's pov🌹

I thought back to the time when I thought I was alone and Logan didn't love me, now in the circumstance that I'm in, those thoug seem pathetic. A few months ago I thought I was going to die with out Logan, now I know I will.

Sadness by death comes in three stages, at least for me it does.

~stage one: Terrible tears. You cry so much you don't have any more to cry.

~stage two: Realization. This is when you realize you won't be able to talk to, see, or spend your life with the one you love.

~stage three: More crying. You cry even more until your now limited amount of tears run out.

My stage at that moment was some where in between two and three, but since my first stage lasted so long I didn't have enough tears to be in stage three yet. My life was over and I wasn't even fifteen. I kept asking my self why him? Why not me? What if I didn't run? What did I do to deserve this? Honestly I wanted to die. I wanted to skip the third stage and go straight into a new made up forth stage, not one where you get over it and get better. One where you skip to anger instead of sadness, one where the thought of depression becomes your best friend, and since no one could get me out I sank in to a deep depression.

I stayed in bed all day. I didn't have the energy or desire to move. I didn't have the desire to be happy. I didn't have the desire to eat. I didn't have the desire to speak. I didn't have the desire to breathe. I didn't have the desire to live. The day was passing and I didn't care. Sinking sunlight seeped into my room and burned my eyes. I heard quiet knocking on the door and Weston made his way into the room.

"Hey sis, how you doing?" He sat next to me.

"Other than being absolutely horrible, I'm absolutely horrible. What do you want?"

"To talk if that's okay with you."

"Fine." There was a long period of time before we spoke. We kind of just sat there before I said. "Why did he have to die? Why couldn't it be me?"

He looked up and met my eyes then he looked down again. "You know this was the kind of crap I was hoping you weren't thinking. Do you really love him?"

"Yes more than anything, and that's why I want him to be the one alive."

"Then you don't love him, because if you truly did you wouldn't want him to hurt. If he were the one alive he would be the one with pain. Don't think about killing yourself either."

"And why not?"

"If you kill yourself you won't go to heaven where Logan is waiting for you. Do you want to disappoint him like that?"

"No."

"Okay then, go live your life but you don't have to date again anytime soon or ever, I'm not asking you for that, I just want you to go on with your life and follow your dreams even if you don't have Logan to accompany you," he put his hand on top of mine and rubbed his thumb acrossed it "I promise you'll always have me."

"Okay." Tears began running down my cheeks.

"Let's go to the beach, be ready in five." He didn't give me an opportunity to decline so I through on a swim suit and brushed my hair. I took a longish look in the mirror and wiped a tear off of my face. I ran down the stairs and met Westson there. "You look halfway sort of not like death anymore."

"Haha very funny."

"I know."

"Oh did I forget to say bazinga or were you also being sarcastic?" He lightly shoved me and laughed.

"Race you to the beach."

"In you dreams."

"Aren't you supposed to say that after I say I'll beat you there."

"Now that's really funny. You know I don't run."

He picked me up from my waist and carried me to the beach and dropped me in the water. I looked in the distance to Rascal's house where Callie was and saw an ambulance in the front yard. I got kind of worried but then I remembered that there was an earthquake and hoped that Rascal's awful mother was the one being put in the ambulance not Callie. 

Weston read the worry on my face and turned around we both saw a girl like figure who was too skinny to be Rascal's mother being put in the Ambulance and we ran to the figure of Callie who was out cold with a broken arm and bloody nose and Rascal crying in the background.