If I believe you

8 // before

*this takes place a month after Matty had left, and she was at home. So I'm saying November?*

I wake up in another strangers bed, though my new boyfriend is probably on my couch. I never thought id be this girl. Spending more time in a club than at my home.

"Bye Alyssa." I hear a deep voice speak as I sit up.

"Its Juliette, but goodbye." I roll my eyes as I pull my dress over my head and stand. I grab my heels in one hand and walk out of the bedroom.

I make my way into a dingy smoke filled living room before rushing toward what looks the most like a front door. As soon as I exit I rush to a bush and vomit.

"Fuck." I mumble and wipe my mouth.

I pick my phone up and order an uber. Now i wait.
____

Twenty bucks, and 30 minutes later im in front of my apartment. I struggle putting the key into the door, and when I'm finally in I'm relieved. Until i hear a slight cough come from the couch.

"Another late night?" I hear his voice grumble as he looks at me through tired eyes.

"Zach I don't want to do this right now." I drop my heels then begin walking toward my bedroom, stripping my dress as I walk. I stumble slightly over the scattered mess beneath me.

"You never want to do this." He sounds exhausted.

Why can i never destruct on my own? I always seem to get someone else involved. Can I not be on my own? Why am I so unhappy?

Maybe I should just pack up and run away. New place, new people, new phone. No. I can hide from friends, but what if he were to reach out. Matty.

I turn around, standing in my underwear. I put my arms out for a hug and he comes to me. He doesn't make me feel safe, he's not him.

I begin crying. Its routine at this point, I fuck up, I get caught, I cry, he forgives me. I don't know if I want him to forgive me this time though. Maybe i should be alone.

"Whats wrong sweetie?" He whispers into my hair.

I pull away from his cold body.

"You aren't Matty. I don't love you." I halt the tears and walk away toward the bathroom.

"For the amount of times you've moaned that name, you'd think I was him." He shouts then grabs my arm.

"Oh really now?" I say as sarcastically as I possibly can.

He smacks my cheek, making my tooth catch my lip and I taste blood.

"You may have spoken like that to him, but not to me." He points at me like im a child.

I stand there shocked. Ive never been hit like that.

A tear, just one falls.

"Get the fuck out of here, and I swear to god if I ever see you again." I whisper angrily.

"How will you swear to a god you dont believe in?" He mocks me. "Ill expect your call tomorrow. Slut."

I walk into the bathroom, closing the door quietly. The quiet is piercing.

It started good, a week after Matty left I met him. Of course in a club. He bought me drinks, then took me out the next night. It was pleasantly normal. I thought I wanted normal.

He started acting like I was a possession and thats when I started sleeping with other people. Proving a point?

I start the shower and sit down under the warm stream.

I want to be happy again.

___
THIS IS A MESS SORRY.

I just think someone in this situation wouldnt have clear thought. Idk.

Is it decent so far?

Im lowkey liking the sequel better than the original lols