What's Wrong With the World? (A Book of Angry Rants)

22 Years

I know that nobody actually gives a shit about this but I do and I just really needed to put it somewhere. This actually really means a lot to me please refrain from making jokes this is really fucking serious.

Today marks the 22nd anniversary of April 5th, 1994, the day that the Seattle PD found Kurt Cobain's body in a greenhouse.

This case has been opened three times. Once in 1994, again in 2014 for the 20th anniversary of his death, and the third time just this past March.

All three times that the case has been investigated, Kurt Cobain's death was inevitably ruled as a suicide.

I'm actually starting to believe that now. I guess I just went along with the conspiracy theories because I was too upset to face the truth.

Part of the reason why I love Nirvana so much, is of course, Kurt Cobain. His lyrics are absolutely astounding and are able to continue to voice teen angst to this day.

There's also something really special about his voice. He sounds different on each of Nirvana's studio albums, but his voice has something in common in all three of them.

He sounds like he's exploding from the inside. Whenever he sings or screams or just groans, he's unleashing the demons inside of him.

Especially in the 1993 studio album, In Utero. It was released a year before Kurt's suicide, displaying a mental breakdown at it's finest. The track I Hate Myself and Want To Die was seen as a joke and Kurt's explosion was considered artsy expression.

I think I admire this so much because I wish that I could do it. Just let all my negative emotions out and explode everywhere. I wish that I could do that and make it turn into something beautiful like Kurt did.

His music has just really helped me through rough times. He says the things that I can't say and screams the screams that I can't conjure.

I really wish that he was still around. Maybe he could make more music and find someone who truly loves him. *squints at courtney*

As Frances Bean Cobain (Kurt's daughter) said: "He wanted his band to be successful, not be the voice of a fucking generation."

I think that he just couldn't take the pressure of being famous anymore.

But thank you.

Thank you Kurt Cobain for helping me face my demons head on.