Never

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    I huffed as my foot slammed into Poe's chest. He fell onto the floor with a thud. I smirked. I mean Poe was an okay fighter but he really needed to touch up on his combat skills.

     "Need a hand?" I said having a  hard time wiping the smirk off my face. Poe grabbed my hand a pulled himself up.

      "I'm starving." I said running a hand though my white hair. "Yeah me too." Said Poe sending me a smile.

      "Race you their!" I shouted at took off down the hall excitedly. "That's not fair!" He yelled back.

      I laughed and sprinted down the hallways. I smirked knowing that I was way ahead of him. I ran into the lunch room calmly waltzing in.

     "Damn it." Said Poe who was panting. I laughed at him an playfully shoved him. I grabbed an apple off of the table and took a bite.

      "So slow poke, what's your next mission?" I asked with a playful smile.

     "It's a secret." He said putting a finger over his lips. I glared at him. "Please? Pretty please?" I said is hung out my bottom lip trying to do puppy dog eyes.

"Hmmmm," he said pretending to be thinking hard,"Let me think about that. No."

"Humph." I said crossing my arms over my chest and pouting. Poe laughed and poked my cheek. I glared at him slapping his hand away.

     "Your so mean." I grumbled while taking another bite of my apple.

   "Are not"

   "Are too"

    "Are not"

    "Fine whatever, don't tell me. I'm gonna go train." I said standing up and walking away from Poe. I mean, of course I wasn't mad. But that doesn't mean I can't make try to make him think I am though.

     I bit my lip trying not to laugh at the thought of a frustrated Poe.

     "Oh! Excuse me miss!" Exclaimed a golden droid. I glared at the droid," Can I help you?" I sneered.

     "General organa would like to see you." Said 3po perkily I groaned and pushed pass the droid and marched down the hallway annoyed.

     Leia was not what she once was. Her light brown hair was graying, and her once beautiful complexion was now covers by multiple wrinkles. Age was not the only thing that did this to her, but many other things.

"General Organa" I said saluting her respectfully. Leia nodded at me. She radiated authority, yet warmth. "Your probably wondering why I've contacted you. I have a new mission for you."

Excitement rushed through me. I was sick and tired of staying in this base. I needed to do something productive. And going on a mission was perfect.

" You need to bring my son home." She spoke softly. "Please. I need him home. And I know you want him home again. " she whimpered quietly.

Leia hesitated. "I know you loved him. And I know you still do." She pointed out.

I scoffed," Pardon my attitude , but I loved Ben. Not the monster that he calls himself now. I can't, and never will love Kylo ren." I spat. The name sounded vile on my tongue. I was disgusted with myself that I even said his name.

"Very well." She said pressing her lips Into a thin line. "But you will bring him home."

I nodded trying to control the red hot anger that coursed through me, completely replacing the excitement.

I calmly walked through the hallways heading towards my courters keeping calm and minding my own business so I wouldn't blow up on anyone.

I slammed the door behind me in anger. I slammed my foot into my dresser over an over hoping for this terrible emotion to be relieved. But it did nothing. Hot tears pooled out of my eyes as I slammed my foot into the dresser.

I slid down the wall sobs racking my body harshly. Leia was right. I still loved him. And I needed him home. So, so badly.

I didn't want to love him. He was a monster. A cold blooded killer. I was repulsed by my feeling for him. Why did I love him?

I let out a frustrated growl and tugged on my hair.

I stood up and walked into my bathroom. I flipped in the tap. I cured the cool water into my hands and splashed my face, I looked into the mirror to see a sad girl staring back at me. Her crystal blue eyes looked sad, filled with longing and pain. Her Snow White hair was tangled and in messy locks. The girls high cheekbones was stained with tears. And then I remembered that that poor broken girl that had a tuff exterior to the world was really me. And I was pathetic and broken.

I tied my hair up and ran down the halls to the training center.

The training center was nothing amazing, but it had stuff that you needed to train. I unzipped my hoodie to reveal my black sports bra.

I took a swing at the grey punching bag. The bag barely swayed from the impact of my hand. I groaned as slammed my foot into the grey bag with red hot anger.

     The bag hardly moved and inch. I let out a scream if anguish. Suddenly the bag began to move violently  as if an un know force (A/N hehe.... Get it?) was moving the heaving bag.

    The bag stopped moving as my anger melted away. I raised my eyebrow in confusion. Could I really be force sensitive?

      I glance around the room to see if anyone was in training hall with me only to see that it was empty. There's no way that I could be force sensitive. I mean, I didn't know my parents. But that does not mean that I could be strong with the force. Right?

       I backed away slowly from the bag and threw on my sweater. I hastily zipped up my sweater and sprinted out of the room. I ran into my room  and shut the door with slam and pulled open my dresser.

     My clothes where thrown out in a tangled mess as I looked for the item I wanted. I pulled out the box and tossed it to the floor.

   Hey guys! How are you liking the story? This is my first Star Wars fanfic sooooo..... It might not be great but I hope it's okay. Please comment down below and give this a heart! Thank you guys! Ilysm!