Chap. 1.4

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He holds my shoulder. “Why did you go home this time?” he asks. I can see to his face the strangest facial expression of all. Is he happy or mad?

“You know dad, I spend two hours here outside. Can I get inside now?” I say. He face is still the same. I only count the seconds I spend outside while using my hands. I wonder if I can smile or laugh but hours are passing me by. I cannot take it any longer. I need to go inside. I am badly tired from my departure.

I push dad away and I run up to my room. I lock it without any hesitations and lie down to my bed. It is nice to be back again. My old room and my old house; my favorite pillows that I used to hug tight before; my smooth blanket where I hid myself from danger and my Stefan Ella (A pink teddy bear with a ribbon on its head). I spend every moment inside my room, caressing it, hugging it and laying down with it. I never mind hearing my dad’s sermon outside my door. I rest comfortably until I fall asleep.

The next day, I wake up from a nice dream. I was dreaming about a princess who saved a prince from a battle (I think it is a reverse story). Then, the princess fought for her love of the prince then unfortunately, she died in his arms. The princess was shot in her heart letting her fall down in front of the prince. The prince could not accept that he won the battle but her one and only true love dies. He also killed himself but he never did it. He kissed her if there is a second chance but it never worked out. Then, suddenly, the princess gasped. The prince fainted out because that kissed was a change. He gives all his air to the princess (How foolish is he to offer his breath? I thought it was only a kiss). Lastly, they live happily ever after with two babies. 

It is unfinished. That dream tricks me. I think I could dream more. Does the prince wake up again? How can it be? I stand up and fix my bed while thinking of that story. Later, I hear Joan’s voice outside. She is yelling with dad. They are talking about something. I do not know what is that something is but it is convincing to me. I go downstairs and go out the house with my nightgown. When I open it, I never expect that they will come as early as this. What time is it? I watch the clock. OMG. It is already nine at the morning. This is incredible. That dream is too long. I sneak out again.

Why my friends are here? Who told them that I come back? Maybe, Sam tells them that I arrive but she is not there. She might be hiding now inside her house. She had better do that because if I see her, I will pull her down to hell. Why does she do that to me? I never say anyone about this. This is not my intention to go home. I sneak out for the third time and I see someone new there. He might be their new friend (I hope it will not be their new exchange of me). I go up to my room and change clothes. I peek in the window and mom still there, entertains them. I recall now, Joan has no job during Sunday unlike dad, almost stresses out himself.

I go downstairs and open the door. They watch me simultaneously. They are silent. Every mouth is off from talking. It is as if a wind blows, a very bad wind blows. If they want this bad wind, my butt burps out the excess carbon dioxide and if possible, a methane gas. They just laugh at me and I join them too. Unpredictably, I hear Sam’s voice from a distance. I move my head to where she is. She is in her house, at her terrace. What is she doing there?

“Harris, Morris, Gina, Sophie, Tony, Dwight” she roll calls. She never mentions my name. I knew it already. It is here plan. I only see my friends running to Sam’s house leaving their new friend alone. My mom goes inside the house leaving the two of us alone. The morning is cold with brightness from the sun. I want to deny when he gives the bouquet of flowers to me.

“Thank you” I say. He offers his hand to me. I want to shake off my hand to him but I am shy. His blue eyes sparkle when his face is hit by the sunlight. Oh, he is damn beautiful. His clothes fit to his sexiness.

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