The Incredible League of Goth Pizza Haters (RH)

Part 27

Author's Note: Hahahahi th ere people I just wanted to let ya know that this entire chapter is just about Sylvia's backstory and if you skip it I won't be offended and it probably won't be hugely confusing for you if you do. This is obviously the longest chapter I've written so far so if you're going to read it I would suggest popping some popcorn and taking a comfortable seat while I send you down the intense roller coaster that is Via's life :)))

---Sylvia---

"I spent all of my high school years waiting for college. Then I spent the half year I was in college waiting for whatever was supposed to come after. It's a tactic I've used since I was a kid to get through the more depressing parts of life. You just have to get by one step at a time. Though, all the while I was working towards adulthood. After high school, I thought, this is it! I've made it. I can finally go and live my life. I forgot about college. And I got into a good college, too. So I couldn't just not go. I went and worked my ass off. I was gonna be a writer. So I wrote. Essays essays soo many essays. I was in a relationship with this girl... I think her name was,-"

"You date girls?" Ricky asked suddenly and I realized I'd never had that conversation with him.

"Oh yeah... I forgot to tell you you've been hitting on a raging lesbian." I smiled really big as his foot dragged in the mulch and he had a wonderfully stunned expression on his face. "I'm kidding, you twat. I'm bisexual. I like boys and girls. Do you have a problem with that? Are you a homophobe?"

"No, no. Not at all. I have a few gay friends. I support them and their lifestyle. I just don't, ya know, live it."

"So you're a supportive hetro?"

"Yeah."

"Good, anyway I'm gonna refer to that girl I was dating at the time as 'She Who Shall Not Be Named' because she was a manipulative bitch."

"Yeah, I've dated similar people. What did she do?"

"She cheated on me, quite a few times. And stole from me and manipulated me and didn't care at all. She said she loved me, which was a blatant fucking lie. Anyway, I went into a depression while I was in college. Just from not being where I wanted to be and afraid that I would spend what were supposed to be the best years of my life in school. I felt kinda trapped cause I couldn't leave and all I was doing was working, sleeping and occasionally partying. ... I ended up developing anorexia. It didn't get too bad, my ribs were showing and I got pretty underweight... but it wasn't too bad. I started wearing big sweatshirts and avoided swimsuits and tank tops and no one noticed. 'She Who Shall Not Be Named' noticed, but she never said anything. We were both always weird about food so I guess she figured it wasn't her business. Have you ever suffered a mental illness or eating disorder? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I just thought this was the sharing circle or something and I hate hearing just me talk."

"... Yeah. I had some depression after quitting college, I left to pursue music. And it wasn't working out so... Yeah. I know what you mean. With the whole 'everything wasn't working out' and 'feeling trapped'... I have indeed been in a similar place myself. I haven't ever had an eating disorder, though."

"They suck. That's all you need to know... Anyway I did something I really shouldn't have and ended up in the hospital for it. I don't want to talk about it but I will tell you I had to get surgery and spent a few weeks recovering. I didn't really even try to get back on my school work... After I recovered they deemed me unstable and a danger to myself. I spent two months in a psychiatric home being rehabilitated and after I was released I had to go back every week for full body checks and x-rays. So, like I said before, they suck. All mental illnesses suck."

"That's... wow. That sounds pretty serious." he stopped the merry-go-round and stared at me, hard. I knew he wanted me to tell him what I'd done, but if I did I knew he would worry about me like Cody does. That or he would deem me fucking crazy and avoid me at all costs. I felt that familiar twinge of regret in my stomach. That I wish I hadn't told him that because now I know he's going to judge me kind of twinge.