The Incredible League of Goth Pizza Haters (RH)

Part 32

---Sylvia---

Eviction notice for:

Sylvia Deluca

You have thirty days to vacate the premises before your belongings will be confiscated by the state.

Shit.

I knew this was going to happen soon. I'd been behind on rent before and I knew my landlord wasn't gonna take much more. Money was tight, and he knew this. But he was also very unsympathetic towards younger people.

I informed my mom of this and she agreed to let me move in with her until I could get back on my feet. When I entered my house I was only greeted by one cat. My heart nearly stopped. I asked my mom in a panic where Andy was and she said he was at her house. She said that he'd been really sick and the vet gave them medicine but he's still not doing well. We decided to wait till tomorrow to start moving my stuff.

I visited him at the house and petted his frail figure. His bones poked out through his thin skin and all he'd done in the past few days was sleep. I sat in the guest bedroom with him for over an hour hugging him and crying. I've had him and his brother since they were kittens. Since their mother was hit on the road. They were my babies and I hated that I'd had to leave them. I hated that he was sick and I couldn't help.

***

Over the next few days we hauled most of my stuff either to a storage locker or to my mother's house. Andy remained sick without getting any sicker. Wally disliked the change in houses and wandered around meowing and confused. My brother, Nick, was graduating the coming June and was staying with mom until then. He planned to then buy a house and move in with his girlfriend.

He helped carry my stuff and we made friendly conversation. Growing up, we'd been best friends. Closer than anything. And now we barely spoke. We had one conversation about his sword collection. He had a hobby of collecting them and he wanted to be a blacksmith, designing custom weapons as a career.

Dani, still only in her second year of high school, remained pretty happy until dinner time. Then the light died from her eyes and she twirled the pasta noodles around on her fork. I asked if she was okay, which was stupid because she so obviously wasn't. She responded by producing the fakest smile I've ever seen and nodding.

That evening and the three following it were depressing.

The house was a wreck, though it was mostly the basement. The living room was littered with cups and plates. It looked like a college party swept through. The play room where my siblings and I had kept our childhood toys was wrecked. The shelves were broken and splintering wood littered the floor along with wrecked toys and shredded books. 'Dani did this,' my mother said, 'after you left.'

The basement itself was the worst. My mother's bedroom was down there and the only thing untouched by the devastation was her bed, which was never made. Cups, bottles of alcohol, Abby's clothes and pictures of us littered the floors. The laundry room was heaped with clothing both dirty and clean all scattered about in a huge mess on the floor. The bathroom smelled like candles and smoke from all the long bathes she took. The sink was lined with stress reliever lotions and creams. How could I let this happen?

The days were speant with us all doing our own things, my mom laying in bed most of the time complaining of the pain in her joints. Nick spent most of his time texting/calling his girlfriend or playing video games in his room. Dani wandered throughout the house retrieving food and going back to her room to eat and sit in the dark. She constantly dropped comments about how she wanted to die. About how horrible she felt. I took walks down the street and swung on the swings in the park. I made videos and I wrote but all the words my brain vomited up were too vague or too sad to be carried into something melodic.

I started to feel depressed again which brought up fear inside me. I didn't want things to go downhill again. I didn't want to feel how I did in college. If I ended up in a mental hospital again then this time people would know. People would find out.

My family's sleep schedule was pretty upside down. Despite still being in school, Dani and Nick stayed up late and had trouble waking in the morning. My mother slept until three in the afternoon and I stayed up in the nights staring into dark corners, unable to conquer my sleepless mind. Sometimes I cried when I thought of Abby. Or when I thought of what I did to my family. But most times I just sat in the darkness of my room and felt absolutely nothing.

I feel as though my life is falling apart again and I'm unable to do anything to stop it.