Dear Insanity... I messed up again.

Chapter 11

          “What do we have here, Cam?” Danny said, eyeing me up and down like I was a piece of meat. I could already tell; Danny and I were not going to get along. “You always seem to pick up the real pretty ones, and I need to take lessons, apparently.”

          “It must be the gangly greasy appearance that gets the ladies. Or maybe it’s the masculine smell of sweat.” Ben teased.

          Cameron was embarrassed now, lowering his head in defeat. He just stood there, looking awkward and upset. Ben and Danny continued their onslaught of insults. I stared in disbelief. I can’t understand why someone would allow themselves to be treated this way. I scowled and glared at Danny. Ben was behaving until he showed up.

          “Easy with the glare, Ice Queen.” He said, coldly. My fists balled themselves and I was about to lose it when Gage grabbed my hand, reminding me to act classy.

          “What the fuck ever.” I answered him, grumpily stuffing my hands back into the pockets of my jeans.

          I could see regret cross Ben’s face, and he lowered his gaze. He wasn’t a lost cause. He knew what he had done bothered me a great deal. Danny, on the other hand, lived by not regretting and having no feelings.

          “I’m going back to the fucking van.” I stated. Gage looked at me curious. “I’ve had enough of this bullshit to last me a lifetime.” I walked away, shuffling my feet.

IVY’S POV

I looked after Alex as she stormed away. I could understand where she was coming from. She had seen the same defeated look on my face for a long time, and watching someone else bullied into that state bothered her a great deal. I looked at Jesse, whose grip had loosened lightly. He was chatting quietly with Sam.

          “So are you two…?” Sam asked gesturing to our hands that were still entwined.

          “Oh, no. We’re just really close friends.” Jesse replied, a dark blush rushing onto his face. “Ivy’s too good for a sap like myself.”

          Sam laughed. His smile was contagious and I felt Jesse relax even more.  I lightly touched his arm.

          “I’m going to go after Alex.” He smiled and nodded. I heard him and Sam agree to a couple beers as I hustled in the direction of the van.

          As I approached, I heard Alex singing softly to herself, and smoking a cigarette in the empty trailer. She was clearly upset still. I slowly approached. Alex is… Well, Alex. When she’s upset, it’s usually best to leave her to figure it out for herself.

          As I approached, Alex looked up and smiled softly.

          “Hey, Little Lamb.” She greeted. I waved silently and sat next to her. Just like Alex, to bottle up her feelings and try to hide how she really felt about the situation.

          “Alex, what happened? They were just teasing.”

          Her face fell. She immediately threw up her walls and clammed up. Her eyes darted to the floor and her finger began to trace the large scar on her right thigh. Her eyebrows furrowed together in frustration.

          “They were hurting him. And they knew it hurt him. That’s the worst part. They did it on purpose. To MAKE him feel that way.” She growled under her breath.

          “They are all a tight knit bunch, perhaps you took them too seriously?”

          “I didn’t take them seriously enough. I should have broken that pig Worsnop’s fucking nose.” She said, her eyebrows knitting tighter as she took another long drag. She pulled out her pack and offered me one. I politely declined.

          “Alex, you need to quit assuming that every man out there is going to be an ass. I mean, they weren’t doing anything wrong. Cameron didn’t ask for your help or defense.” She scowled.

          “Just go, Ivy. I don’t expect you to understand.” She said turning her back to me. She’s never done that before.

          “Alex…”

          “GO.” She snapped. I shook my head and headed back to the large bus.

ALEX’S POV

          How could Ivy not understand? Did she not see the hurt on Cam’s face? Did she not notice how defeated and small they made him feel? Not only did she not understand, but she DEFENDED them! I scowled. Maybe she was right. Maybe I was taking Danny and Ben too seriously. I fumbled with my shaky hands and lit another cigarette.

          “Hello?” A meek voice called out.

          “What the hell do you want?” I answered back harshly.

          “Sorry. I’ll just… go.” It was a man’s voice with a thick accent. I stood and stretched, and walked to the end of the trailer to see Ben standing there awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck, about to walk away.

          “You, of all people?” I asked coldly.

          “Well that’s a way to speak to someone you don’t even know. Jesus.”

          “You’re one to talk!” I said getting more annoyed.

          “Look, I came here to apologize to you properly… alright?” I looked at him with disbelief.

          “What?”

          “I’m sorry for the way I acted around you. It was reckless and not very cool, and it obviously bothered you.” He said, looking at his feet. “And I’m sorry for my mate, too. He can be a downright ass sometimes.”

          “You don’t need to apologize for him.” I said, calming down.

          “Still, I feel bad.” Ben said looking up from the ground.

          “Smoke?” I said, holding out my pack. He smiled and took one.

          “Thanks.” He sat down next to me, and attempted to make small talk. “I talked with Cam a bit. He says you’re really nice. I figured then that I had done something seriously wrong in your book.” He smiled half-heartedly. “So I figured I’d best apologize.”

          “I appreciate that.” I said, leaning against the spare amp. The sun had begun to sink toward the horizon.