Message in a Bottle

The Journal (9)

Chapter 9

*Ciara's POV*

I pull into my driveway and look at my self in the rear view mirror, I look like a wreck. My brown hair's tangled together, the curls falling out of place. My make up was smeared from wiping my eyes continuously, the last thing Harry called me was "a fucking liar."

I park behind Jordan's car and angrily open up the door, dragging myself out of the vehicle. It was around 8 o'clock and I was exhausted, well at least my eyes were from crying so much. It feels like heavy bags were on top of my eyelids, weighing them down more and more each passing second. I can't believe he wouldn't believe me. Then again, if he did believe me I would be in shock too. The story's crazy, but it's the truth.

I unlock the front door with my keys and turn the knob, forcing the door open with my hip, "Jordan," I yell immediately.

"Shh!" She hushes me as she walks into the kitchen, "Mason's asleep."

I stumble into the wooden chair and put my hands on my forehead, "I need to tell you something," I whisper, even though no one else was around to hear. It's been too long, I've been hiding this secret from her longer than anyone else. She knows half the story, now I'm just going to fill her in on the rest.

"You look like a mess, what happened?" Concern was lingering in her voice.

"Nothing, well not nothing but-" I groan, throwing my hands over my pounding head. I need to talk to someone that actually had some potential in believing my story. "I know who Mason's real father is." I manage to say as I calm myself down.

"Who!" Her eyes widen as she edges closer to me in her seat.

"Harry Styles..." I gulp.

"Huh?"

"I know it doesn't sound right, but it is!" I was talking faster now. "I've known it all along, but it's not like anyone would believe me if I told them. I doubt you even believe me!" I was tapping my fingers against my leg quickly, afraid of her response. She was staring at me with a blank expression, I couldn't read anything that was racing through her mind.

"Why is this coming up now?" She asks.

"Harry's the one who sent the message in a bottle, Jordan!" I yell, hitting the table loudly. I could tell she wasn't processing this all in yet, I still couldn't, even after 2 whole years.

"So two years ago, you had sex with Harry Styles. Then, you had his child. And then, two years later he just shows up again, because of a fucking letter in a bottle?" She made a laughing remark which meant she's getting annoyed.

"Jordan, you need to believe me!" I plead, grabbing her hand.

She snatches her wrist back quickly, "seriously Ciara, what's wrong with you? Why do you think you can just say Harry's the father of Mason just because you went on one date with the guy, if you even did! He's famous!" I couldn't believe my own best friend wouldn't believe me. I was becoming furious. I rake my brain for a reply but I wasn't able to think of one, I couldn't even function. "I'm leaving," she hisses as she grabs her purse.

That's when I remember something that would show her that I wasn't lying about this. "No wait Jordan, I have something to show you!"

She turns around, annoyance clear on her face, "what are you going to show me?"

I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner. "Follow me?" I ask, grabbing her hand as I pull her into the living room.

"Better be good."

Even though she said all those cruel things, I wasn't going to hold it against her. If the situation was reversed, I don't think I would believe her either. But she needed to have at least some faith in me, I'm her best friend.

I release her arm and pick up a chair, placing it in front of the entertainment center that held the television and other useless decorations. I crawl on top of the chair's surface and carefully stand up, overlooking the top of the furniture.

"What are you doing?" Jordan sneers. I rummage through a box of books and old movies and finally find what I'm looking for, my journal. I tuck the composition notebook in between my arm and cautiously get down. Once I was safely on the floor, I turn around to find Jordan with her hands placed on her hips.

"When you read this, you will find out I'm not lying," I hand her the book. She hesitates, but accepts it into her possession. I put the chair back in it's proper place and then sat down next to Jordan on the couch.

"What's it about?" She flips through the pages, skimming the length of the entries.

"My lies," I answer, pulling a piece of hair behind my ear so it won't be in my way while I read.

She begins to read intensively, biting at her fingernails while in the process. Every once in a while she would look up at me, but then quickly return her gaze back to the writing once she realized I caught her glancing at me.

This journal was something I would go to when I needed to vent out all my feelings. I started writing in it when I realized I was pregnant, the date was March 5th, 2010. March 5th was about 2-3 months after I had first met Harry, that date was January 14, 2010. I remember the date exactly because it was the day after my 18th birthday.

Anyways, when I found out I was pregnant, I started bawling. There's still tear stains on the sheet of paper from when I wrote that particular entry. I didn't know what to do, I wanted to tell Mike everything but then I would have to raise my child alone. I didn't want to be a single mother, I don't think anyone would want to be.

It's not that I'm a bad person, I just made a few mistakes in my lifetime. Even if I did have the opportunity to go back to the night I had with Harry, I wouldn't change a thing. If it wasn't for that night, I wouldn't have Mason, and he's the most important thing in my life.

"I'm so sorry for not believing you," Jordan cuts into my thoughts, putting the journal back on my lap. I nod, not knowing how else to reply. I'm doing everything I can to not cry in front of Jordan, I need to stay strong, not just for me, but for Mason. "Ciara, I really had no idea," I could see tears starting to form in her green eyes.

I smile, tears spilling out of my eyes as well, "how could you know? I'm just glad I have some one now," I throw my arms around her and nudge my head into her neck.

Now, all I have to do is get away from Mike.

*

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