As Long As I Remember

The Breakup

"Not only were you adopted, but Maria was your sister."

I can't believe I am saying this right now. Matt isn't Matt Hawk. Matt is Matt Oakley. That means the Hawk's separated Matt and Maria when they were little! That's cruel and sick!

With so many emotions swirling around my head, it takes me a moment to notice that the look on Matt's face has changed. His expression of pure shock is now replaced with a look of bitterness. I walk towards him. He's sitting on the plywood floor of the attic. He's just sitting there with a look of disgust on his face. I approach him quietly.

"Matt."

He doesn't acknowledge that I even said anything. Tentatively, I keep walking towards him, eventually settling down next to him.

"Matt."

Still no answer.

I put my arm around his broad shoulders. He immediately relaxes under my touch.

"Matt.... "

"Chrissy, I'm a little shocked right now, okay? I just need sometime to think. For now, let's just go to New York. We'll head over the Outer Bridge into Staten Island. You'll search for Maria, and I'll help you. But you need to give me time to take this all in. Don't ask me about it; it won't help."

"Okay, but I really just wanted to help you."

"No, Christina. You can't help me with this. God, just stop it! You're so clingy all the time! God, just stop. Just give me space!"

The words sting. They really do. Tears begin to well up in my eyes. I feel like someone took a knife to my heart and cut it in half. I remove my hand from his shoulder.

Don't cry. Don't let him see you cry.

"Fine. I could care less. I apologize for being such a clingy girlfriend," I say with sarcasm, "Let's go. We need to leave now. I have a lot of places to go if I'm going to find out anything about Maria."

My voice sounds cold and distant, like it belongs to someone else. I see the hurt register in Matt's chocolate brown eyes.

Good. That's what you deserve. Don't just expect me to sit here and take all that stuff you said without a word or two back.

We both storm out of the attic, making sure not to look one another in the eye. We're on the front porch when our shoulders accidently brush. Immediately, I feel the usual tingles and shivers. That will probably never change; I love him too much. At that moment, Matt grabs my arm and turns me so I'm forced to look him in the eyes.

"Look, Christina. I didn't mean what I said earlier. But I just can't deal with all this extra stress right now. I can't be worried about having a relationship with you when I have to worry about not getting you killed. It's just too much going on. I love you. I really do. But I can't be your boyfriend right now."

He did not just say those words to me. No. No. He didn't just break up with me.

The tears that I had been holding back before threaten to make a reappearance. I manage to hold them in, but not before one slips by.

"We can't be in relationship right now. I'm sorry."

I don't answer him. I just stand there.

He wipes away the stray tear on my cheek.

I really love him.

He just broke up with me.

I have to get over him.

That's gonna be the hardest thing to do.

I still love him.

Then, to make matters worse, he kisses me. It's a ghost of a kiss, soft and sweet, but it's still a kiss. And it gives me a strand of hope to cling onto.

Talk about mixed signals, Matt. This really isn't helping!

After the kiss is over, he says only one thing before we continue on our mission.

"I still love you, Christina."

A/N: Hey people!!!!!! SOOOOO....... WHO DIDNT CRY ALITTLE READING THIS CHAPTER?!?!?!?? I CANT BELIEVE I BROKE THEM UP!!!! IM SUCH A TERRIBLE PERSON! although they might get back together soon, I needed to break them up so I could develop their characters more as individuals. But its sweet that they still love eachother ;D so yeah they're headed off to Staten Island now! will they find any answers? will the mystery of Maria's death ever be solved? answers to come :D I love you guys so much and ill try to update ASAP. VOTE/COMMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love you readers!!!! you are my inspiration!!!!!!! -marierosa13 **Romans 8**