ONE LAST TIME

Well played Ethan

Listen to Faded by Alan Walker

Whirling disco lights
Your eyes had golden sparks
The way your lips whispered my name
The way you twirled me around

August evening falling leaves
Your voice rung with promises
The way you held me to your heart
Ours beat together against the world

Cloudy morning grey dark tarmac
Your lips tasted salty and your eyes cried
The way you said goodbye from
The tear stained glass window
The bus pulled away leaving me

Remember darling,
You promised all those impossible things
You told me never to forget all our memories
I never did .
Never could.
I was drowning in the sugary words that poured down from your mouth
And all the lies that I fell for.
Should have ran when they told me to.

I crush the ball of tissue for the hundredth time and throw it across the room to the waste basket.
And for the thousandth time I keep replaying his words. Those damn words that now hold my heart so tightly that it is difficult to breath.

I kept wishing over and over again that we were real. Somehow I survived those two months thinking atleast those two weeks weren't a figment of my imagination.
But the bet.

Fucking Ethan Grant Dolan and his words. His stupid promises. Of course everything makes sense now.
How he came and sat with me for breakfast. How he was everywhere.
I growl lowly squeezing my eyes shut.

He knew I was hurting. He knew I was broken yet he fucking dropped me anyways. Played me like a fucking conquest and I was too naive,too caught up in his eyes and lies to understand.
Fairytales don't exist. I had just begun to realize it.

After Nate and Ishita took me and Riya away, Ethan had come running but I had flipped him off. Riya had slapped McKanzie and screamed at him.
She had cried and crumpled to the floor while Ishita had tried to comfort her. I was too numb to do anything anyways. Nate had been holding me and glaring at Ethan.
For once McKanzie's eyes had shown guilt and broken and I almost felt a pinch but the moment I saw Ethan with him everything had vanished.
A crowd had gathered near the parking lot and Sia with Briana had ushered me to the car.
I remember laying at the back seat howling uncontrollably.
I remember Ethan standing at the road his face flushed while the car pulled away.

How bittersweet is the reverse replay of life?

I remember throwing my stuff around while Briana and Sia simply stood there giving me space.
Then I had told them to leave me for sometime. Heck I even gave them a small smile. I must be deranged.

This was 6 hours ago.
And now I feel sick as if someone is squeezing my life out.
I flop down on the pillow and stare up at the ceiling.
All these times he lied.
His eyes are stormy and his lips are quivering.
"I will always love you Juve. Never forget that."

Forget him Juve. Forget him for once.
I blink once,blink twice.
But his face is still etched in my memory. It is all a part of my mosiac now and removing him will mean removing me myself.
The door creaks open.

I turn to see a ray of light stream in and Sia pops in her head,her eyes are tired. She calls out her voice soft and almost scared.

As if it can break me.

I nod at her beckoning her in.
She smiles straightening herself up. Behind her Briana comes in while I pull myself up and make space for them.

For a moment they sit on the bed staring at my disheveled state and for a second I feel ashamed of myself.
Just then Sia clears her throat making me look up.
It is almost 11 pm now. I have been locked in this roon for so long with all lights out
"Juve, just say the word. I am already to go kick his arse right now if you allow!"
I smile flinching at her voice. She is pissed and you don't simply mess with a pissed Sia.
She may look all sweet and soft but when she gets hurt or someone she cares about gets hurt, you are officially dead.
I pat her hands.
I suck at this. No matter how much I want to scream at Ethan and slap him I know I will break if he gets hurt.