Chapter 18, Love
As I was laying in my bed, I kept thinking about what I had said to Ethan yesterday. It wasn't my intention to be harsh but he asked for the truth and I gave him just that. I had just hoped that we would've kept on talking, sort things out between us and maybe plan another hang out. But instead, everything got turned up side down because I hurt him, I mean, I guess I hurt him. He looked hurt.
It didn't feel nice to know that I hurt him, I kept seeing his face in front of me, the look in his eyes when I told him he acted like a dickbag.
But how could I make it clear to him that how he acted wasn't what I wanted from him?
I didn't know what I wanted from him, actually. I knew I wanted to get to know him better and become friends. But did I want more? I couldn't tell. I couldn't get a hold of my feelings for him.
Since the very first time I saw him, I was hooked. I felt so attracted to him. His laugh sounded like music in my ears and his eyes made me forget about the rest of the world. Some people call this love, but this wasn't love. This was being attracted to someone and feeling special 'cause he showed interest in you. This wasn't love.
I didn't want to experience love ever again, it had hurt me too much the first time to go trough all of that again.
"You know I love you right?"
"This isn't love anymore, Oliver." I let out a deep sigh, "This is acting like we love eachother. We are so in love with the idea of loving and having eachother that we deny everything that is going on. This isn't what love is supposed to be like, Oliver."
"It is, Katie." His voice was loud and determined, "I love you and I do everything for you. I support you when you want to do something and I comfort you when you're sad. We go out together or stay in together, we laugh and cry together. People who are in love do these things, Katie."
"People who are in love don't hit their loved ones."
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HI BUPS
here's a lil new chapter for ya, it isn't a long one but I promise I'll upload a couple in the next week!!
Hope you liked it, please give me some feedback!
Xoxo Janne
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Secrets // Ethan Dolan
FanfictionTHIS BOOK NEEDS SOME SERIOUS REWRITING! I'll do that when I finally finish it. Katie Campbell has secrets, secrets that nobody knows. She moves to New Jersey to escape them. Ethan Dolan is the normal high school popular boy everybody crushes on. H...
