It felt like time had completely stopped as I stood there, my fingers still wrapped against the cold brass door knob.
Louis William Tomlinson was hard to deny on a good day. Now, standing in front of me, looking like the literal definition of sex on legs, holding a giant bouquet and looking up at me through his giraffe like eyelashes, framing perfeclty blue eyes, well... Denying him almost felt impossible.
I had to swallow back the words that were trying to escape my mouth. I chewed on my lower lip, starring at him in awe, trying to remind myself exactly why I couldn't just fling myself at him. Obviously sleeping with him had completely changed the way I looked at him. I couldn't push away the burning thoughts of attraction.
But I would not throw away what I had with Max because I was attracted to a famous boybander. Ten million girls all around the world we're attracted to him... It was just normal. Have you seen him? But what I had with Max was deep and rooted with history and a love I refused to give up on.
"Louis..." I murmured through a trembling lower lip. My fingers curled tighter around the knob and I leaned against it to hold me upright. "You know I'm going home to see Max. You can't change that."
Louis winced a little, and it felt like I had broken him all over again. He lowered the flowers and let out a long sigh. "The flowers aren't for you, Stella," he said with a bitter bark. "I know, you love him or whatever. I don't get it, but I respect it. I respect that I can't change how you feel, no matter how badly I want too. But I promised a long time ago that I'd come with you to surprise your little sister. Whether or not this is killing me, I refuse to break my promise and disappoint a little girl."
I vaguely remembered the time Louis suggested he'd come. I steered him away from the idea, and it was in no way a promise. But when he said that my knees began to shake and I just wanted to cry because how could anyone in this entire world be so god damn perfect and not even be aware of it? How could anyone so perfect care that much for me. How could I not even care enough about him to spare his feelings the tiniest bit? Fate worked in the cruelest of ways, because meeting Louis Tomlinson might have been one of the greatest things to ever happen to me.
But of course I had to lose him.
"Louis," I started again, brushing my bangs out of my eyes and while not tearing apart our met gaze. His eyes looked sad, but he tried a smile. "You don't have to come..."
He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and nodded.
"But," I started. I needed to keep myself from finishing that sentence, because he couldn't come. I couldn't drive three hours sitting next to Louis. I couldn't introduce him to Max... it would ruin everything. "But if you want to come, I'd be happy to let you."
A smirk grew across his features and he bit down on his lip, trying to stop it while looking down. A blush crept across his face.
"For Lily," I added as an afterthought, scratching at the back of my neck.
Louis nodded. "Right, for Lily, of course."
"Oh yeah, obviously for Lily!" Alexis snorted from the background.
"Oh... Hi Alexis," Louis mumbled. "I didn't know you were there." His cheeks flushed red, clearly embarassed by the confession of how much I was hurting him that he'd just given.
"Of course I'm here."
"Well... I've got to go get a rental car. You coming?" I asked, ready to get out of th awkward tension.
