Aphmau Oneshots

Happy Birthday Cakes (Kawaii~Chan x Zane)

It was another lovely day in Phoenix Drop, and Kawaii~Chan had just opened her bakery. Flipping the "closed" sign to "open", she opened the door and stepped out to take in all the buttery sunshine. The Meif'wa purred happily as she basked in the light. In her mind, she knew that today was going to be a wonderful day.

    It was another terrible day in Phoenix Drop, and Zane had just left his girlfriend's apartment. After another fight that ended in tears, he was done. But of course, tomorrow was her birthday, and he would be the real jerk if he broke up with her on her birthday, and she always made him feel guilty when he ever broke up with her. She always drew him back in, even if he didn't want to. He sighed, walking down the path and out into the obnoxiously bright sunshine. Mumbling obscenities under his breathe, he headed to the bakery to get a cake.

   Kawaii~Chan whistled a tune as she bustled around. Putting fresh baked cookies in the display case, cleaning the windows, pre-making dough and frosting. It was all part of her daily routine. As she put the last batch of goodies in the display case, the cheerful Meif'wa looked up to see a man standing outside, looking through the window at a cake display. His black hair covered one of his eyes, and his long sleeved turtleneck covered the lower part of his face, so his mouth couldn't be seen. He sported all dark colors and a sour expression. Kawaii~Chan wondered who the mysterious stranger was, and if he was going to come in or not. She quickly realized she was staring and looked away, busying herself with the position of some cupcakes.

   Zane approached the bakery, squinting at the bright, colorful sign. He groaned, hoping whoever worked here didn't have a personality equal to the sign's demeanor.  Looking through the window at a cake display, he frowned at the cheerful "happy birthday" written in icing. It wasn't a "happy birthday", it was anything but happy. He felt the anger building up in him, and he let out a deep growl, startling a passing jogger. He was buying the cake, he could get any cake he wanted. Finally, he decided what he was going to do.

   Kawaii~Chan was cleaning the counter when she heard the shop bell ring, a sign of a customer. She looked up to see the mysterious stranger storm in and slam 20 bucks on the counter, startling her.  "How do I passive-aggressively say screw you in cake?" He growled. The startled Meif'wa opened her mouth, but no words came out. She quickly recovered and tried to speak, the man interrupted her again. "Sorry, um..." He blushed and looked down. Kawaii~Chan smiled at him and giggled. He looked up at her, surprised at her reaction.

"It's okay, that's the most interesting thing that's ever happened to Kawaii~Chan." She giggled.

The man looked confused. "Um, do you normally speak in third person?"

She laughed. "Only on days that end with y. Now about that cake..." Kawaii~Chan raised an eyebrow as if asking him to continue.

Zane stared at the cat-girl-woman he had just startled mere seconds ago, who was now smiling, instead of scolding him for scaring her. She was the strangest person he had ever met, and he had met some pretty strange person. Not only was she talking in third person, she also donned all pink. Even her hair was pink. And she single-handedly contained all the cheerfulness possible. Her personality beat the anyone's he had ever met. But there was something else about her, he couldn't place his finger on it. He came back to reality when he noticed her had been staring for a long time. "Kawaii~Chan", as she referred to herself, was saying something.

"Sorry," he shook his head, "What was that?"

Her never-ending smile still on her face, she repeated herself.

"Oh, the cake. Um, yeah, so do you know how you would do...that?"

"Well," she thought for a moment. "You could make the cake all black, black cake, black icing, black lettering.."

He nodded. "Um, I guess. Would that be considered passive-aggressive?

She shrugged. "Kawaii~Chan doesn't know. She doesn't exactly have experience with making passive-aggressive cakes. Can she ask why you would want one, sir?"

He coughed uncomfortably. "It's for, uh, someone I don't like, particularly. But I'm, um, with them, so I have to or I'll look like a jerk."

The cat-girl cocked her head to the side in confusion. "Excuse Kawaii~Chan for asking, but why are you with this person if you don't like them?"

He opened his mouth to answer but found himself speechless. Why was he still with her? It wasn't just because it was her birthday tomorrow, it definitely wasn't because he loved her, or even liked her. He didn't know.

But he did know he didn't want to be with her.

"I-I, don't want to be with her." He said, thinking out loud.

"Well, there's your answer then." Kawaii~Chan smiled softly at him.

His mouth dropped open. 

She was the smartest person he had ever met.

He recovered, his face breaking into a huge grin. "Thank you, Thank you!"

She laughed, a beautiful, tinkling sound. "You're wel-"

He cut her off with a kiss on the lips. Her eyes widened as he broke away, a grin still on his face.

"Thank you so much."

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