Hey, Vantas? (DaveKat)

Depression.

My name is Dave Strider. I'm seventeen, living with my bro. I guess you could call me your average white male, then again, you couldn't.

It's been three months. Three freaking months since I was diagnosed with Depression. The doctor gave me medication, but I threw it out the window. I know it sounds stupid, but I'd rather have the agonizing feeling of sadness and negativity eat at me than feel a synthetic happiness, or whatever you want to call it. My bro doesn't agree with me on this, but he doesn't really have a say. I know he's worried, but honestly, I don't care. I mean, I do care, but I don't have the energy to show it.

I don't really have the energy for anything these days. It's almost as if... I don't know, my soul is being sucked out of my body? No, that sounds stupid. But, it's the only way I can really describe it. It's like this thing, Depression, is a Demon. It feeds off of my emotions and slowly sucks them away, along with my soul, until I'm nothing but a... I don't know... nevermind. You get the gist of it.

I've lost lots of weight the last month, and I usually dont get out of bed, so I don't get much excersise either. I've become a weak, pale figure. I don't like to look in the mirror anymore, because it just shows me what I've become, what I'm doing to myself. The only times I really make an effort to be active is when I need to go to the bathroom, and when Karkat is trying to troll me. He's really the only thing keeping me alive. You've no idea how many times I've thought about committing suicide, just ending it all. But I couldn't do that to him. I just couldn't.

I'm currently laying in bed, listening to the silence surrounding me. My face is buried in my pillow, and my blankets are pulled up over my head. I reach for my shades which are next to me on my nightstand as I hear my door being opened, but I pull my hand back when I hear my bro's voice.

"Hey lil' man." He says in a fake, cheerful voice. I groan quietly in response. "I'd ask how you're feeling, but I don't think you'd be able to respond." He chuckles. I don't say anything, just pull my blanket over my head some more. I hear him sigh and I feel a big hand on my shoulder.

"Dave, listen. I brought you a bag of chips and some apple juice. I'm not going to force you to eat, but please, just try. You know I care about you, and it... it makes me... sad... to see you like this. The least you could do is eat. But again, I won't force you." I heard footsteps, then the sound of my door slamming. I could tell bro was taking it hard.

I slowly turned on my side, pulling my blankets away from my face. On my nightstand next to my shades were a bag of cool ranch Doritos and a bottle of apple juice, as promised. Just then, I noticed a notification on my computer, which was sitting on my desk across my room. Karkat.

I sat up, rubbing my eyes. I tried standing, but sat back down, winded. My lack of eating had caused me to become dizzy whenever I tried to move. I shook my head and tried again. Leaning on my nightstand and wall, I made my way over to my small computer. I sat down and sighed. Apparently I had three new messages. One from John, one from Sollux (the past couple of weeks he's been trying to talk to me, I'm not sure why though, I don't bother to look at his messages anyway), and one from Karkat. I clicked on his username.

CG: HEY FUCKASS.

TG: Hey.

CG: LISTEN, CAN I COME OVER LATER?

TG: Um... why?

CG: BECAUSE I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN MONTHS ASSHOLE, AND GOG KNOWS YOU'RE NOT COMING OUT INTO THE REAL WORLD ANY TIME SOON.

TG: Uh... sure I guess...

CG: GOOD BECAUSE I WAS ALREADY PLANNING ON COMING OVER.

I switched over to John's messages.

EB: Dave? I know you won't answer, but I just wanted to ask how you were doing. I hope one of these days I'll be able to see you again. I don't know if I can come over to your house for a while. It's not that I have plans or anything, it's just that I don't think I'll be able to see you like you are to be honest. I'm sorry, just please get better.

I might as well look at Sollux's messages too.

TA: Hey 2triider. II know you've been readiing my me22age2, 2o II ju2t wanted two 2ay hii. We all kiind of mii22 you, and iit would be niice iif we could 2ee you agaiin, but what can you do? Anyway, 2ee ya.

I stood up and walked out of my room. I walked down the hall and into my small, crowded bathroom. Locking the door behind me, I took a comb that was on the sink and began to run it through my hair when I heard a soft knock on the door.

"You alright in there?" Bro asked. I looked down at my hands.

"...Yeah..." that was the first time I'd actually spoken today, and my voice was raspy and deep. I ignored his response and splashed water on my face. I didn't bother to look in the mirror. Taking a hand towel that was draped over the shower, I wiped my face off. I walked out of the bathroom, only to be caught entirely off gaurd by Karkat. I gasped at the realization that I wasn't wearing my shades, and he turned to look at me.

He had been heading up to my room, but now he was walking towards me, his eyes wide open. I couldn't close mine, I didn't care anymore anyways. So what, he saw my mutant eyes, it doesn't matter anymore.

"...Dave?" He said calmly, coming closer to me. I looked down at my feet.

"I know. I'm a freak..." I felt tears forming in my eyes. Karkat took my face in his hands. He looked almost... angry.

"DAVE WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING AB--" He sighed and shook his head before speaking again. "Dave, my blood is the color of your eyes." Tears started to stream down my face as I listened to him. I began to shake, so I took a few deep breaths. I didn't know how to respond. He didn't think I was a freak? I began to feel something in the pit of my stomach.

"Oh..." I breathed out.

Karkat's POV

What do the humans call it when you have flushed feelings for another? Love?