An Instrument in His Hands

Part 1 Chapter 21

Part 1

Chapter 21

Muloki and I knelt down to pray aloud. I had often seen him do this with Andrew and the other missionaries. I promised my Heavenly Father that I would do whatever he asked of me if He would clearly reveal His will to me and give me the strength to do it. Hard as it might be, I intended to follow through.

Muloki prayed next, ‘Oh God, please manifest thy will to thine handmaiden. Her destiny is important to all who are in this kingdom. Help her see beyond her own needs and those of her immediate family. We pray that thy will may be done.’

‘Muloki,’ I whispered. ‘Open your eyes!’

Before us stood an angel of God, white and glowing with glory.

Muloki fainted, fell to the ground as if dead.

I looked to the angel, who said, ‘I am the same messenger who came to Alma, Aaron, Ammon, Onmer and Himni, and am come to direct thy path for good.’

Wow. I was stunned into silence.

‘Blessed are you for your faith. Blessed are you for your continual willingness to do the will of the Lord and to stand for what is right at all times and in all places. Blessed are you for your willingness to forgive your enemies. The Lord is pleased with your desire to marry his servant, Aaron. It is not expedient at this time for you to complete the betrothal to him, for I have a greater work for him to do for a season.’

I blinked, half in relief, but mostly in disappointment. What was I to do? Mother…? Andrew…?

‘I will lead you away to a new land where your vocational skills will be much sought after. There you will be as a mother to hundreds and influence thousands for good. There you will prepare the way for my word, and my will, and my great work among that people.’

I always knew that I would not get married. Why did that make me feel sad? Would I be alone?

‘I will go before your face, and angels will be on your right hand and on your left. Follow the promptings of the Holy spirit, and your journey will be made with perfect safety.’

I watched as the light gathered back around the angelic messenger and he ascended upward. Then I too fell to the ground beside Muloki and knew nothing.

Probably it was hours later when I awoke to the louds sounds of Muloki yelling, ‘Ouch! What are you doing? Get away from me!’

And Mother screaming and brandishing a fire poker at Muloki, ‘I’ll call the authorities and have you arrested for rape!’

I stood.

Mother continued her harangue, ‘How do you expect her to marry Aaron, with you sneaking around behind his back and seducing young women? I’ll see you stoned!’

‘Mother!’ I screamed to get her attention.

Muloki grabbed her from behind. She kept trying to hit him with the poker until he forced it from her hand.

How could we go from such a holy experience to this?

Mother kicked Muloki and stomped on his feet. She continued to scream wildly about his villainy at the top of her lungs.

‘She’s insane,’ Muloki complained.

‘We’d better get her to her room and put her to bed,’ I suggested.

‘I’ll need your help.’

Together we twisted and dragged my demented mother through the hall, where she managed to pull down a lamp and a pot to hit Muloki over the head again. At last we inched her though her bedroom door and pushed her onto her bed. ‘Stay!’ I commanded.

‘I will not stay here in bed while you cavort...’

‘You are overwrought. When you calm down you can listen to a perfectly rational explanation.’ But was it rational?

‘I saw what I saw! He’ll not get away with this!’ she screamed and attempted to get up.

‘Mother! If you tell everyone a tale like that, I will not be able to marry Aaron. You will not become mother to the Queen.’ I knew from experience that this was the only way to control her.

She screamed over and over again in frustration. Then she took her pillow and tore it open. Feathers blew out everywhere.

‘Should we tell her about Andrew?’ Muloki whispered.

I shook my head no. Slowly we backed out of the room, closed the door, and I quickly bolted it.

We leaned against the wall, and looked at each other.

‘Did I really see an angel?’ Muloki whispered.

‘Yes,’ I panted.

‘Did he speak to you?’

I nodded.

‘Are you going to sign the papers today?’ and Muloki glanced towards the door behind which my mother continued to scream in frustration. Then we heard her pounding on the wall.

I shook my head no.

‘You’re not?’

I continued to shake my head. ‘I’m to leave Zarahemla.’

He looked his disbelief.

I whispered over the noise in the bedroom, ‘I’ll have to do it. You know I promised to do whatever the Lord directed me to do.’

Muloki protested in a louder voice, ‘I didn’t think he would direct you to do that! What about Aaron?’

I put my hand to my head trying to remember. ‘The Lord has another work for him to do – for a season, I think the angel said.’

Muloki looked upset. ‘Did he tell you not to marry him?’

I thought hard for a moment. ‘Actually, no. He said God was pleased with my desire. I think he said, ‘Not at this time.’

Muloki shifted, looked at the bedroom door and back again. ‘Aaron is not going to like this.’

‘Neither will my mother,’ I said, and I looked back at the door too. ‘No wonder I was directed to leave.’

Muloki glanced back at the bolt as a piercing shriek sounded through it.

‘I must leave, quickly, I think. Will you help me, Muloki?’