An Instrument in His Hands

Part 2 Chapter 9

Part 2

Chapter 9

‘I’m going to miss you,’ Daniel confessed to me the night before voting day. The Zoramites sat statues of the cute little rice god all around the town and promised to build a large sanctuary to house him in the near future, providing years of work for all who desired it. Many people already were throwing coins into his coffers, so we were certain that they would win by a clear margin. If there were no irregularities in the election, Daniel would soon be on his way.

‘I’ve enjoyed your company too,’ I replied with a half smile. I was going to miss him too. It had been a long time since I had a Christian friend.

‘Will you come with me?’ he asked tentatively.

‘With you? Where?’ The election was tomorrow. Did he mean the celebratory event? Hadn’t I already promised to be his escort?

‘To Gideon. To the next election.’

My smile fell. ‘Daniel? What are you saying?’

‘I’d like you to come with me. Having you for an escort is extremely helpful. Your skills and education are proving invaluable to me.’

‘But you are not a family man. Are you suggesting marriage?’ Of course he must be!

He grunted. ‘I suppose I am. I’ve never known a woman like you. You would be a great asset to my career.’

‘But, Daniel, there would be children.’

I could tell he had not really thought of that. ‘Well, we could find a way to deal with that.’

‘I would want children. They are an important part of a family.’

‘Like I said, we would find a way to take care of them.’

‘I would want you and me to take care of them!’

‘Hmmm… I see your point,’ he mused. Then he added, ‘Since we are talking about our children, does that mean you agree to go with me?’

‘I did not say that! I am just clarifying what you are offering me.’

‘Will you think it over tonight?’

I sighed. ‘I’m sure that I will not think of anything else. Nor will I sleep. You will have to carry me to the ball tomorrow night.’

‘I’ll carry you right now!’ He surprised me by picking me up in his arms and carrying me the rest of the way home.

I cuddled into his neck. If I said, ‘Yes,’ this would be my husband. Could I marry him? Could I?

‘Do me a favor,’ I mumbled.

‘Anything,’ he replied.

‘Kiss me like you really love me.’

He proceeded to do so, holding me, right there in the street.

Could I feel that ‘Zing’? I tried very hard to find it, but failed. Was I too old? I felt nothing for him.

‘Was that a “yes”?’ he asked when we were done.

I kissed him tenderly again. How I wished it were! Oh, how I wished it were. I was so lonely.

As predicted, I tossed and turned all night. Then I prayed. ‘Oh, God, who hast led me to this land and to this work, dost thou have a new work for me to do with Daniel?’

At last I dreamed. I dreamt that I was climbing up a high mountain pass and Aaron was walking on ahead of me. It was him! I ran to catch up, calling out his name. Then I ran faster and still could not catch him. Daniel called to me from behind and I stopped and turned to look downhill at him. He gestured down the mountain where the way was easier. When I twisted back uphill to run after Aaron, my way was blocked by an avalanche of rice gods.  Desperately, I began to push and climb over them. When I could not, I looked down at the gods and gasped. They had fangs!  I looked back uphill at Aaron, who had reached the summit. I stopped struggling and just watched him. He was magnificent, filled with the glory of God! How I wanted to be with him! Then he disappeared over the edge of the mountaintop. I awoke with my pillow wet with tears.

I knew that I could never go with Daniel.

The Zoramites won the election and Zoram became the judge of the Land of Antionum with several of his peers as lower judges serving under him. The construction on the Great Synagogue would begin during the next season.

Daniel and I danced with them until the end of the second watch, when he walked me to Andrew’s home, carefully guarding me from the inebriated celebrants still wandering in the streets.

I began to cry because I knew what I must tell Daniel.

He pulled me close to him. ‘Are you coming with me?’ he asked again.

How could I tell him no? I would never, ever, receive an offer of marriage again. Andrew had assured me of that this very day.

‘I c-can’t,’ I whispered to Daniel. ‘I want to, but I can’t.’

He held my shoulders. ‘Why not? I’ll fix it, I promise.’

I shook my head back and forth. ‘You can’t fix this.’

‘Anything can be fixed.’

‘Not my heart,’ I whispered.

He squeezed. ‘Abigail, I’ll take you without your heart. It is the rest of you that is needful to me.’

‘You would marry without love?’

‘We have feeling between us. I expect it will grow with time.’

Time, I mused.  Would I have as much love as I had with Aaron in another ten years? Or could I have Aaron’s love in another ten years?

I decided to wait for Aaron.

‘No,’ I whispered. ‘I will not go with you.’

‘Please?’ he begged, then he kissed me to persuade me.

Daniel’s  kiss did not persuade me.

Slowly, I released myself from his embrace and went into the house. ‘Good-bye, Daniel,’ I said as I paused at the door. ‘I wish you well.’

‘If I ever meet up with those confounded sons of Mosiah, I promise to tell them where you are.’

I smiled through my tears. ‘Thank you, Daniel. Thank you.’ And I blew him a kiss.