Love And War (UPDATED)

after last night

I woke up thinking about last night. i cant believe i actually had sex with jake last night. i felt ray hands on my waist as he starts kissing my neck. r: morning, beautiful. me: morning. r: are you still weery about last night? me: yes. i cant believe i did that. r: i know, it was messed up that you had to do that, but you had to do it for your family. and i respect you for that. he kissed me. r: i love you. me: i love you too. i hug him and i went to take a shower. I came out wearing (PIC) and i went to jonas hotel. me: hey. j: hey britt. i walked in and sat on the sofa. he sat next to me and hugged me. j: i wanna say that you didnt have to do that last night. me: jonas, not now. j: brittney, YOU HAD SEX WITH A GUY THAT RAPED YOU AND ABUSED YOU. WOULD HAVE SAID NO AND FIGHT IF I WAS YOU. me: jonas dont yell at me. j: COMEON, HE WOULD HAVE GOT YOU PREGNANT AND YOU WOULD KEEP IT. i looked at him and stood up. me: YES THE FUQ I WOULD KEEP IT!!! ITS MY BABY TOO IF I DO GET PREGNANT!!! AND YOU KNOW I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO KEEP YOU IN MY LIFE!! i started crying. me: YOU ARE MY BROTHER AND THE ONLY PERSON THAT REALLY KNOW ME!!! DONT MAKE ME MAD BY TAKING YOU OUT PLZ DONT!!! he hugs me tight. j: ok, stop crying. im sorry i yelled at you. its just that i didnt want you to get hurt again. me: i know how to take care of myself jonas, you know that. he looks at me. j: but sometimes you need more strength than your own. i smile and i hug him again. me: can you babysit danny for a while? j: sure. have fun with ray. me: um ok? i go to where daniel was and kissed him on the cheek. he woke up. d: mommy! he hugs me tightly. me: hey sweety. d: i love you. me: i love you too. now jonas is gonna keep you till i come back, ok? d: ok, mommy. have fun. me: you too sweety. i kissed him on the cheek again and went to jonas. me: see ya later. j: ok, bye. i went back to the room and ray was watching tv. i jumped next to him. me: hey, i told jonas to babysit daniel, so we have most of the day for ourselves. r: awesome. i wanna go out as a family tonight. he pulls me close. me: oh yea? r: yea. me: ok, where are we going? r: its a surprise. me: ok, how do i dress? r: formal. me: ok, well ima go talk to maye and nene. r: ok. someone is knocking on the door. i get up and open the door; it was nene and maye. me: wth are you guys doing here? n: we wanted to surprise you. m: you did amazing on the show friday. me: thank you. they walk in and see ray. n: hey boy. r: girl who you callin a boy? ima man. m: i guess you are since you taking care of your son. her and nene laugh. r: shut up. ima be with the guys so yall can have girls time. me: shut up. r: see ya later. me: bye. he kissed me and left. me: so, how's life? n: its good, and i am expecting. me: aww, do you know the gender yet? n: no, ima find out next week. me: who the baby daddy? n: this guy name ricky, and he is really helpful. we moved in together 2 months ago. me: congrats. what about you being silent? m: i might be getting married. me: aww thats awesome, to who? m: you remember trey? me: yea, omg yall are such a good couple. m: yea, we been dating for 3 years now. me: and you havent told me? m: had to keep it on DL. i shook my head. n: what about you? me: oh, daniel is doing amazing, we are all going out tonight. m: wait, you ray and daniel? me: yea. n: girl we need to go to the mall and get you ready. me: ok, sure. i get my key and we go to the mall.