Changez

•7•

It was my 18th birthday.

I felt no different and I was still in a dark place in life.

Pac and I had received an A+ on our report and was invited to homecoming tonight but we both decided we didn't want to go.

Besides, Pac wanted to throw his own party.

He had gotten extremely popular and well known; More and more people started to flock to him after he whooped Eric's ass. Pac didn't really care for the attention.

Kadijah and I haven't been speaking much. She was too busy sniffing after Rodney's trifling behind.

I had no idea how I was supposed to spend my day, but I didn't expect much. Pac really wanted me to come to his shindig, but I had no fly gear. I mean, it wasn't like he would care or anything, but I ain't wanna show up to no function lookin like a rag doll.

I walked out my room and there was no sign of mama nor Daniel.

I looked around and our home seemed emptier. Things were just disappearing before my eyes. Like my boom box, I hadn't seen it in a while.

Every time I saw mama, she looked thinner and messed up. I didn't know what Daniel was doing to her, but she was allowing it.

Pac and I had grown closer over the past few months and he was deeper than I could've ever imagined.

He helped me cope with my mother's new behavior and habits.

She started sniffing and it destroyed me inside.

Daniel turned her into a dope fiend but Pac taught me that you can't want more for someone than they want for themselves.

I opened the fridge and it had nothing but a can of beer and some dead roaches.

My stomach was growling, and there was literally nothing to eat.

I fixed myself up some kool-aid and sat to watch TV.

Yo! MTV Raps was on, they were playing Fear Of A Black Planet's 'Fight The Power'.

I bobbed my head to the music and held my fist up, as if I was in the video.

The house phone rang.

"Chello? Casanova of the ghetto speakin..." I mimicked J.J. Walker.

"Happy Birthday, Mo! What you doing tonight??" I heard Kadijah's voice.

"Thanks, girl. Shit, I'm broke as a joke. What can I do?" I stared at the floating gnat in my kool-aid, disgusted.

"Now you know I gotchu! You my girl! Im gonna come scoop you, and we gonna go get you some fly threads for Tupac's party tonight." She exclaimed.

"You not going to homecoming?" I asked.

"Uh-uhn, bump that homecoming! I'm gonna go to Tupac's jam. All them fine cats he know? Shietttt. I'm tryna hit some skins." Dijah laughed.

"What about Rodney? Ain't he gonna be there too?" I asked.

"So what? He cheat, I cheat. We cheetah's. So uh, I'll be over in 20. Make sure you're ready. Your crackhead mama home?" She asked, hurting my feelings a bit.

"Naw. They both gone."

"Prolly shootin up in a alley somewhere." She giggled.