"Im scared..."
My voice taunted me in my dreams. I just can't believe I sounded like a baby that early in the morning, now Im embarrassed to show my face to her. She's probably laughing at me at the other line. Though she came in and I didn't see any amusement or funny emotions written in her eyes.
In fact, I saw how tired she was. She slept on the couch without a word. Of course It made me happy, though, she was not there anymore when I woke up this morning.
Sighing, I chew on my apple. Jessy cut apples for me, since wala sila Ella.
"Jess, how is it to be a nurse?"
Jessy looked at me then back to her clip board, "it is tiring but it's really fun."
"Do you work all day and all night?"
"Yes."-Jessy
"That's not fun Jessy."
"It is when you love your work," she said and reached for my hand. "5082, huh! That's your number." Sabi niya at saka nagsulat ulit sa clip board niya.
"Do you love your work?"
"Yes, I do love my job. But Im more in love in helping people."-Jessy
I frowned, may mga tao talagang ganun, kailan kaya ako magiging ganun? Tsk, bahala na nga lang.
"Do you choose to love people? Or it's natural?" Baka natural, I wonder why I feel like Im different.
Si Rachel ganyan din mga sagot niya eh, si Alexa naman mas malalim, tapus itong si Jessy... Pare-pareho sila ng point pero iba-iba naman kung paano nila sabihin. Bottom line, Doctors and Nurses did not choose their job just because it's what they like, it's natural.
Smiling, Jessy glanced at me, "I think it's natural, in born. I mean based on my experience, when I was a kid, I really love to help people. Specially when my friends have bruises and such things, I wanted to heal them."
"Did you not change your mind when you're starting to get knowledge from other stuffs?" It's possible though, like kahit in born pag ka gusto mo.
"No. I do love Math, English and other subjects or courses but when I started to learn Science like every branches of Science, there! I did not stop and I felt like I wanted to learn more about it."-Jessy
"You really love it huh?" Nakangiti kong tanong, halatang halata naman kasi sa pag ngiti niya, kung paano siya mag kwento. Punong puno ng interest ang mga mata niya.
"Yeah." She pointed her pen, "you? Do you love something, like passion or whatever productive stuffs?"
I gulped, "I honestly don't know what Im doing with my life."
"No, no, no! That can't be!" She laughed in disbelief, "you're joking! Hahaha!"
Napatingin ako sakanya, tumawa din ako ng mahina, "Im serious."
Huminto siya sa pagtawa, unti unting nawala ang ngiti sa labi niya. "How could you say that? I mean, I do believe that people love something, and we do have that specific job in this world."
"Really?"
"Yes!" She gasped, "what you're saying is impossible."
"But what if it's possible?"
She shrugged, "nah! Trust me. Sometimes people are lost, they don't know what they're doing and stuffs, but really... You just need to clear things up and figure things out."
"You think Im lost? Do I need a rehab or something?" Natatawa kong tanong. Tinignan niya ako ng seryoso kaya napaseryoso na rin ako.
"You don't need rehab. You know what you're doing..."-Jessy
