Kitty's Life for Show!

Im done

I'm so done! You know why!? Im just do sick and tired of my family getting on me for being myself! If I don't answer I'm rude in their eyes! Or even I decline something I'm rude! If I don't want to fish I'm rude! I'm so fucking done with it! But I don't really know who I'm actually telling this to you know, it's not like anybody reads my trash I call writing. I guess I do it for myself so I don't you know keep in all my anger. Cause writing is the only way. I'm just tired of how I'm treated. I can go into anxiety mode and completely shut down and not talk or anything and people get so frustrated with me! That's not my fault, you try having anxiety actually wait no social anxiety ok! It's not fun! I'm constantly worrying about whether or not my friends will replace me because it happens all the time that's why I don't like being ignored, I'm used to it yea but I don't like it. I can't even knock on my friends door, I freak out when I'm in a group of people that I don't know, I can't be surrounded and when there's so many people around me you are going to have to be in front of me and lead me through it cause I can't get through it by myself, I don't like meeting new people and I hate family gatherings on my mom side cause I don't see them as much as I see my on my dads side. And yet people treat me like shit! Calling me mental and saying things are wrong with me! Yes I know I'm different and that there is something wrong with me but you know the Lord wouldn't have created me like this if he didn't think I could get through it.