Author: Divinebychoice1
Book title: What's your choice?
Summary: Lia and Jackson are the power couple. They have been together for three years and shared everything. Girls want a relationship like them and guys are jealous that Jackson has the hottest chick in school. When both are in a horrific car crash, both are left battling for their lives.
Genre: Teen Fiction
My review:
Okay so wow! You've done a really amazing, beautiful job on portraying their relationship and establishing the kind of relationship and bond they have. Just the intro alone was so strong. You were so descriptive and your imagery hit the mark, you were getting me into my feels lol.
I would watch out for the repletion of words. There was once or twice when you used the same word multiple times in a paragraph and that kind of kills it. The solution is as easy as finding synonym and it'll be right on track.
In chapter seven I felt like you could've eased into that scene a little more. Throughout the eleven chapters I felt like there was something missing. I wasn't really able to connect with the character. I don't know if maybe it was the point of view, or that it felt like the story was moving kind of slow at times. It felt like you could have combined a lot of the chapters together and then start a new chapter at number ten. I guess the pace felt more like a short story.
You really used the element of surprise well. It was unexpected, again I think maybe take a little more time on your chapters and easing into the surprising parts. Your writing is beautiful and the story is definitely there, it's just a matter of giving it that little extra you're capable of.
