I'm saying "I do"....but not for Love

Chapter 26

Katy's POV

Jordan and I slept in the same bed for the first time since our first encounter with Khiana. Of couse, I made sure the pillow was between us and that we each stayed on our own side of the bed. Having just sorted out all of our issues, I wanted to be sure that nothing else happened that could complicate our precarious relationship, or cause any amount of awkwardness.

I did have a hard time going to sleep that night. i was relieved that Jordan and I had worked things out. But I was worried about my mom. I was scared that she would change her mind and decided that everything was just dandy and that she didn't need help.

I tossed and turned for an hour after Jordan and I got in the bed. As I fluffed my pillow for the fifty-somethingth time, he sat up. The blanket slid down and I tried to keep my eyes on his face, not on his chest, which was very attractive, I might add. "Katy," he said, his voice rough from sleep. 

Dang, ain't that sexy? I thought. I shook my head slightly, trying to clear my brain. "What?" I said.

"Do you plan to go to sleep tonight?" he asked. He rubbed his eyes and looked at me with a quizzical expression.

"Sorry," I muttered. "Can't sleep." I sat up too, so that we were at eye level.

"Why not?" he said. "Stressed?"

"Eh, I don't know if stressed would be the right word. Maybe more along the lines of worried that Mom's gonna change her mind," I said.

Jordan reached over and took my hand. I tried to ignore the electricity that shot up my arm from that simple touch, and hoped that he hadn't noticed it. "Katy, come on. You're doing all you can. Your mom isn't your responsibility, You can love her and be there for her, but you can't help someone until they're ready to help themselves. You know?"

I sighed. "Yeah, I know what you mean. But I just can't help it. I feel like I've always been more of her mom rather than the other way around. I've been taking care of her more than she's taken care of me for as long as I can remember. For once, I'd like to actually do something for her that's not something like cleaning up after her when she's got a hangover, or picking her up for random crap."

Jordan squeezed my hand sympathetically. "It's gonna be okay eventually. I just know it. But for now, why don't you just lay down and try to sleep?"

I did as he requested, not letting go of his hand. "Thanks," I said. He laid back on his pillow as well.

"You're welcome," he said, settling down. "Night."

"Night," I replied softly. As I laid there, I tried not to think about how nice it was to hold his hand. Or how the electricity kept shooting up my arm. Or how our hands seemed to fit together perfectly. Instead, I tried to focus on counting sheep. It had never worked wonderfully for me before, but I guess it did on that night, because once I didn't remember anything after I got to sheep number two hundred and thirty seven.

*****

The next morning when I awoke, I was in the bed alone. In Jordan's place, there was a note telling me he had to go to a jobsite early and would be back in a few hours to help me settle things with my mom and figure out where she needed to go.