A Jackass Life. (A Bam Margera Love story)

Dick brands and butt chugs

We were filming today with someone I didn't know.
Apparently I'm also not aloud to know what he does yet. The guys wouldn't tell me. They said that it was a 'need to know basis' until we started filming.
I rolled my eyes and waited in the room we would be filming in.
I was next to Bam and Steve-o on the couch

"Why is it a needs to now basis" I muttered more to myself than anyone, but Bam heard it and laughed.

"Because it is. You'll know soon enough. He's on his way" Bam chuckled and held my hand.

I gave him an 'angry face'. Of course I wasn't angry. But, still wish I knew.

Bam kissed me on the forehead.

*time skip *

It wasn't long after that some guy walked into the room and said hey to all the guys, and they greeted each other vice versa.

Then me and the guy both said our "hello's" and we got to the filming.

"This is our friend will, and he has a very special bottom" said Knoxville as the cameras started rolling.

I was confused, that was until the guy who was supposedly named 'will" started to fart on Jonny.

Making all of us laugh.
"Man you are one mingin machine" said bam.
And handed will a party blower thing.
The guy will stuck it in his ass and started to fart again making the party blower make a party sound, and unravel.

It was funny, but honestly nasty.
We all laughed and Jonny stupidly suggested the trumpet.
"You're bringing jazz back to the working man" said Pontius
Wtf.
But will did it anyway making us all fall down laughing.

Bam jumped onto the couch.
"Hey dude, can I bum a smoke?" He Asked.

I shook my head. Cringing, but laughing.
Will put the cig in his butt and bam started to light the cig.

After doing it, will pulled the cig out and handed it to bam who put it in his mouth.

"Bottoms up" someone said and I almost gagged. I was close to puking.

And Bam actually did, making me fall on the floor laughing.
Ryan had to pick me up.

When Bam was okay again, and we continued with the skit. "Dude that was fucking mingin" said Bam.
"Hey babe, can I get a kiss?" He asked making everyone cringe and laugh.
"Hell no" I said without question.
He laughed.

We continued with the skit.
"What about the blow gun? " someone asked and handed will the dart blow gun.
We made Steve-o put a balloon between his ass and let will pop the balloon by blowing the dart out of his ass.

The skit ended and Steve-o thankfully got his clothes back on.

For the next hour we had to drive to some weird Cattle ranch so Bam could get branded.
What the he'll?

*at the ranch*
We were finally doing the skit.
Thankfully Bam cleaned out his mouth, but I knew his ass was gonna be in pain for awhile.

"Alright, you said 10 seconds 20 seconds ago. " yelled Bam at Ryan as Ryan was burning the Dick brand.

Why the hell would he get a dick brand on his nice ass?