What About Us

TERMINATE | TWELVE

My hands shake as I watch Eric sign his name on the divorce form. My heart hammers in my chest and nausea racks my body. He glances up at me and hands me the pen, my hand shaking every more as I start to write, Beatrice. I never would have guessed that I would sign these papers in front of my lawyer with Tobias, Christina, Will, and the girls outside waiting for us.

And what made this all happen? The blue-eyed man who stands outside for me, or the brown hair girls Eric have slept with. It's time for a break and we can't live a lie. He has his things packed up and moved out of the house and he will never step foot to me again. We leave the courtroom, my body feeling much more relieved and the tension between Eric and I vanished. It was costly for us to get separated, but it was worth it.

Tobias is the first to stand when he see's me and Christina and Will remains sitting with the girls. I really needed some close friends here with me while I went through such a big change in my life, I needed comfort, "Let me say goodbye to my girls." Eric muttered and pulled London and Camryn down to the side, away from us and Christina encased me in a hug while I listened intently to Eric.

"Daddy isn't going to be around anymore." He told London who looked at him confused, I stood there with my arms crossed and Christina and Will sitting on the bench while Tobias still stood beside me.

"But why?" She question, tilting her head to the side.

London furrowed her eyebrows, looking exactly like Eric at the moment and he give her a small chuckle, "Because, I wasn't so nice to your mommy and she wasn't nice to me. So, we need a break, I'll still visit you. Is that alright with you?" He asks as Camryn looks up to him with a grin, obviously not knowing what's happening at the moment and I feel my heart shatter into a million pieces as a tear rolls down London's face.

"Don't go!" She threw her arms around his neck and I turned around and had to walk away because I was bawling like a baby and I didn't want the girls to see me.

I felt someone hand's on my shoulder as I wiped my eyes roughly, glad that I didn't wear any makeup today because it would be ruined. I turn around and see Christina staring at me with a smile she pulled me into another hug and I cried onto her shoulder, "What if I did the wrong thing? It's not about me, you know. I want my girls around him since they love him so much and I don't want them growing up without a father." I mumble against her shoulder.

"Well, you also have to think about yourself too, Tris. You can't always be selfless, yes, they are your girls but it's not like he wouldn't pick them up and have a father day with them, you heard him. But, will you tolerate being around him and letting him cheat on you while being out late, hitting you. It's unacceptable." She shakes her head at me and I do listen to her, she does have a point and I sigh, wiping my face, "I understand you. If Will and I split up I would want Delilah to be with him and me, she would miss him so much but if he were treating me bad then I wouldn't want to stay with him. Schedule days where he gets the kids and you can relax. It'll work out. . . give it some time."

I nod my head, grateful for having such a long-time friend like her, "You're right, thanks Christina." We returned and London was sitting on the bench again, she looked tired and I was too. I felt like crap and just wanted to go to sleep. Camryn was in Tobias' arms, her head on his chest, quietly sleeping and then there was Eric. He was standing, staring at the pavement with his hands in his pockets and they gave us some space.

"I guess this is goodbye, see you around." Eric gave me a small smile but he looked relieved, "Keep me in the loop with my girls." I nodded my head at him. We both gave our goodbyes but our skin never touched again, he turned and left and this time, I let him.

+++

London was up under me all day, never wanting to leave my side and I couldn't help but to hold her close to me. Tobias came over and none of us complained, today was an emotionally draining day for all of us and when we returned home I felt even worse, physically.

"Are you feeling better?" Tobias asks as he peaks in the room, Camryn is in his arms and London's head is placed on my chest as she sleeps. I shake my head as nausea continues to float over my body, leaving me violently ill. This has been going on for the past few days and I've officially diagnosed myself with the flu, "Do you want me to go to the store and get you anything?" He asks and then it dawns on me.

Nausea. . . fatigue. . . headaches, everything I encountered with both of my girls. I've been pregnant twice and I know by now that this is not a common flu, "Tobias," I sit up placing London down on the bed and she continues to sleep, I step outside and Camryn holds her arms out to me, "I need you to get me a pregnancy test."

His face falls and becomes hard, my heart stops and if I weren't holding Camryn I would probably pass out, "A pregnancy test?" He questions, "Why would you need that?"

"I've been pregnant twice, I know the symptoms. This isn't a regular flu, I-" I stop talking and sigh, "-can you just get me one. For all I know I might not be pregnant. Judging by the look on his face, I guess he would think I am pregnant too. He nods his head and starts to get his things to go to the store, I hope he comes back.