slow down.

= chapter 4 =

I am SO sorry I haven't updated in so long! School is getting more and more overwhelming but I will try harder to update better! to make it up to you guys I'm updating 3 times today! YAY^.^ Ok I'm going to stop now! haha

love you all

-d

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Today has been such a long day packing! I'm so tired, but I'm on my last couple boxes! Its  leave in two days and we have bought the house already! I dig through my drawers to pack my sweaters. When I get to the bottom of the drawer my mind freezes along with my eyes, mouth, and breath(momentarily). I just came across our memory box. Peyton, Jake, and my memory box. I'm scared. I finally got over them and this is like ripping the stitcges out and stabbing myself again. I breath in and out and I know even though it may hurt I can help but open it. I open the box we went to the antique store and got together to find in it

~pictures of us together

~two popsicle sticks from my first date with Jake. It was a picnic in the park.

~two feathers from when Peyton and I were 13 and our parents finally let us go together to get feathers in our hair at the hair salon in the mall

~two cups from the movie theatre when Jake and I went on our first movie date to see the movie Grown Ups

~keychains for when us three went on a road trip through New York, Maine, New Jersey, Maryland, and Delaware towards the beginning of this previous summer.

I could not bring myself to keep looking through the sentimental objects. Tears were already soaking my face as I gasped for air. My heart feels like its being ripped from my chest. I hate my face when I cry. I just feel so ashamed to be seen by anybody. My eyes are red and swollen. And my lips are puffy and trembling. How could they do this to me? What did I ever do wrong?

Whatever it's over now and I can't let this rule my life. I pick up the box, pulling over the trash bag wrinkled on the ground I put the box in it and tie it up never to be seen again.

Actually NO! I will make them feel my hurt. I rip the box out of the bag and run out tide to spray paint a red "X" on the top of the box. I then called Peyton and told her I'd meet her at Jakes house with him to talk about this in five minutes. I did the same to Jake. I throw a navy blue cardigan over my plain white top. Then slip on a pair of tan moccasins on with black leggings I throw my hair up in a messy bun with practically every strand falling out then grab the box. I swing the door open and make my way down the street just wanting to get this over with.

When I get to the house I can see both of their cars in the driveway. I take a deep breath, walk up to the door, sit down the box on his doorstep. I stand up take another breath then press his doorbell. I turn around with fury in my eyes and run down the sidewalk back to my house

But as I did I stood behind a tree in his neighbors yard. I watch him open the door and Peyton fall into his arms barely crying but its obvious that she is.

"Oh poor Peyton!" I mumble to myself with clear sarcasm.

As I turn around to keep walking I here Peyton say "How could she do this?"

How could i do this? What a fucking kiss ass. She had sex with my boyfriend then make the whole situation about her and makes me look like the bad guy. I'm so beyond done.

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I hope you enjoyed! I'm going to admit this was more like a filler chapter because I'm updating 3 times today! Possibly 4.. but I promise the next two or three chapters will be way more eventful.

QOTD: what state do you live in?

I live in Pennsylvania haha^.^

alrighty lovelys

love you all

-d