Mockingjay: What If......

Chapter 10 - Peeta

I had decided to avoid Prim at all costs. I knew I'd have to talk to her sooner or later, but I was hoping for later. Unfortunately, I wasn't that lucky. She walked up behind me during breakfast, scaring me half to death. "Peeta Mellark, you are in very big trouble!" When I looked at her, I could tell she'd been crying.

"Prim, I...."

"How could you let this happen?" She demanded, "You know you could have stopped her!"

I sighed. "No, I couldn't have. I tried, Prim. I really did! I even followed her to Coin's office. I risked my life for her! But she wouldn't have any of it. She made Coin let me go without so much as a 'Thanks for trying'. She's just so ungrateful, it's like she doesn't even care! Sometimes I don't know why I keep trying!"

Prim just shook her head. 'Neither do I, Peeta." She walked away without another word.

I had lost my appetite, so I headed home. What I found there certainly didn't help my mood. Someone had slipped a note under my door. Curious, I glanced at the signature. It was from Katniss.

I started reading, and my anger only grew with each line. Silly crush? I loved her and she knew it. And I was positive that at one point she had loved me too.

We were good friends? I had saved her life multiple times. And how did she repay me? A kiss here and there for the cameras, that was all. She practically shunned me back home. We must have spoken to each other not five times between the games and the victory tour. If we did talk, it was extremely formal and awkward.

She didn't even thank me when I lied about her being pregnant to Caesar and all of Panem. When we were alone, she scolded me. Scolded me!

"It helps us now," She said, "But what happens in nine months? There's no way out of this. You should have thought it through more carefully."

I had turned away to hide my smile before responding. "Actually, my love, there is a way."

"Oh, Peeta," she had sighed, "I really do love you, just not in that way. How could you even consider that an option? We're getting ready to go into an arena to fight to the death! You know only one person is coming out of there alive."

She had tears in her eyes. "And even if we weren't in this situation, is this really a place you would want to raise your child? Peeta, Snow hates us. Do you have any idea what he would do to our children? I'm sorry, but it's just not going to happen."

So that had been that. I'd never brought it up again, because I knew she would say the same thing. I had resigned myself to the fact that she wasn't going to give me what I wanted.

The sound of heels clicking on my floor brought me out of my thoughts. An all too familiar voice spoke.

"Such anger and frustration. If only there was someone who understood."

I turned to face the intruder. "What do you want, Coin?"

She smiled coolly. "I want to help you, Mr. Mellark. I know exactly what you want, and I have a way to get it."

I shook my head. "I don't want or need your help. And even if I did, why should I trust you?"

She chuckled. "Oh, I'm sorry, did I imply that you had a choice? Let me make myself quite clear. You do something for me, I give you Katniss' life in return. You refuse my offer, and she'll be dead by morning."

This was bad. But there wasn't a choice, not really. I looked her right in the eye. "What do I have to do?"

There wasn't a hint of surprise on Coin's face. She had known what I would say. "It's quite simple, really. Get Haymitch and meet me at the dungeons in thirty minutes."

I forced a smile. "I'll be counting the seconds."

She nodded in agreement and walked out the door.

When I was sure she was gone, I ran to my dresser and pulled out the handcuffs. I had a bad feeling that I would need them. Was this even real? Had Coin been telling the truth? Likely as not, it was a trap. A trap that I was going to lead one of my closet friends into, in order to save the love of my life.

I knew the chances of me leaving that dungeon alive were slim, but there was a chance. A chance that Coin would keep me alive so she could use me. But death in itself was better than slavery to the likes of her.

Before I went to get Haymitch, I looked around the room, trying to lock every little detail in my brain. If my suspicions were correct, I would never see this place again. I could only hope I would die in the arms of my true love.

I was sweating like crazy by the time I knocked on Haymitch's door. I was pretty sure I could feel the lethal Tracker Jacker venom coursing through my veins. I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. Just a few more minutes. Once we were in the dungeon, I could let go.

Haymitch frowned when he opened the door. "What's wrong, Peeta?"

Breathe, Peeta! Deep breaths. Inhale, Exhale. I calmed myself enough to speak. "Everything's fine, Haymitch. I'm fine. We're going to see Katniss."

He looked worried. "I don't think that's a very good....."

"We're going! Now!" This was bad. I was losing control. We had to get to the dungeon, and fast. I grabbed his arm and dragged him down the corridor. He spoke again as soon as we were on the elevator.

"Peeta, I know something's wrong. Very wrong. What are you so worked up about? You know you can tell me anything."

I shook my head. "I told you, Haymitch, nothing is wrong." I gave him the handcuffs. "Just in case things get out of hand," I said.

But when he thought I wasn't listening, I heard him murmur, "They already are."