memory card • jihan

047

"JISOO, gising na. Kumain ka na. Nagluto ako."

A soft angelic voice woke me up from my sleep. I tried moving and opening my eyes. And I was met by the prettiest face of a man I'd ever seen.

"Angel...," I whispered.

He smiled at me. But a twinkle of worry shone behind that smile. Tumibok ng mabilis ang puso ko.

He still cares.

"Hi. Kamusta ka na? Ang taas ng lagnat mo kaninang dumating ako. Masama pa rin ba ang pakiramdam mo?," he asked. His care tugged my heart. It felt like we are going back to where we are used to be: him beside me and always taking care of me.

I tried holding back my tears when pain shot through every fiber of my being. I controlled every muscle to avoid my feeling of miss and regret.

This is all my fault. If I just... tried understanding everything that time, he wouldn't feel pain, he's still might be happy with me, and he wouldn't forget me. God, I want him to remember me.

"Okay ka na ba? Parang hindi pa naman. Naluluha pa yang mga mata mo," again, his concern flooded his voice.

I blinked twice before answering his question.
"I am..almost good," I honestly answered.

Honestly. I won't lie this time. I won't.

"Great. So, bangon ka na. Kahit umupo ka na lang muna. Para makakain ka," he smiled again making my heart flip and trip, then flip again. Napatitig tuloy ako sa kanya.

God, can I sing Healing?
His smile seems like a drug, and it is healing me! Like a miracle, the pain slowly faded and my mood lightened.

"Jisoo? Sigurado kang medyo okay ka na? Bakit ka nakatulala sa akin?"

I snapped. My eyes grew big and heat started spreading in my face. I quickly avoided his gaze.
He caught me.

"I-I am fine," I stuttered.

"Hm, okay." He helped me to sit properly and balance. Then, he took the bowl of soup.

Promise, no one can stay calm whenever they face this guy. His gorgeousness and cuteness is really very very noticeable.

But, I tried not to see those. I ignored the beating of my heart, the butterflies in the pit of my stomach, the shivers and the giddiness. In short, I ignored the biggest distraction of my life who is just in front of me and feeding me.

Feeding me. Yeah, the 2nd greatest challenge that this guy can give me. Because the top greatest challenge is,... him forgetting me. Why would this be a challenge?
Well, the twitching of his lips and the way his brows cross is soooo...tempting...and not to mention,...arousing.

I shook my head.
What am I thinking? I am sick for Pete's sake!

"Ayaw mo na?"

"Huh?"

"Di ba masarap ang luto ko?," his face saddened. "Sorry, nag-order na lang sana ako." He stood up.

Bigla akong nataranta. He'll leave! No! I quickly reached for him and tightened my grip on his arm. "Jeonghan!"

"Huh?"

"Ah..uh, I like the food. Natulala lang ako. Please, don't leave. Don't be mad," I said. He suddenly stared at me intently. My chest hammered and I flushed.

Fuck! This is embarassing!

No one can ever make me feel fear, uncertainty, frustration, shame, vulnerability and care at the same time, except Jeonghan. He is always the one causing chaos inside me. Since I met him as Seungcheol's boyfriend.

"Sure ka?," he asked.

"Y-yes."

He smiled, showing his pearly, beautiful and perfect set of teeth. God, is this a reward or torture?

''Okay!"

Then, he fed me again. I tried staying conscious and controlled myself...and my desires. After, he helped me change my clothes and fix the bed. He stayed beside me. That's because I asked him to. Thanks, God, he did stay with me.

"Jeonghan?," I called.

"O?," he replied.

I tapped the space beside me. "Come here."

He frowned but he followed. He sat on the bed. And I didn't hesitate, I pulled and hugged him tight.
Just like before.

"Jisoo..."

I buried my face on his neck. And I whispered.
"Thank you for taking care of me. Thank you," I love you... "Goodnight, my angel."

"G-Goodnight."

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