(Josh's POV)
I hung out in Dr. Quinn's office. An hour of dead silence. I scratched at my wrists. He didn't notice or care.
He was only doing it for a damn paycheck.
The hour ended. He sighed and let me go without a single word.
I met back up with my grandmother. The office wasn't too far of a walk back to a house and it was a very quick drive.
"Do you mind if I walk around?" I asked.
I bit my lip. She normally says no but I really needed to be anywhere but in that damn house.
"Fine..but I swear to god Joshua don't you dare try anything," she said. I nodded, noticeably cringing as she spoke my full first name.
"Fine," I practically spat out. She left in the opposite direction towards the car. I walked the other way.
I sighed. I really hated breathing. It honestly was a burden to live. This disease just consumed me and it wouldn't stop. It is eating me alive.
"Do it." Blurryface finally spoke again. I was wondering when it was gonna happen. Usually something triggers it and the voices start again.
Therapy always triggered it and blurryface would always fit his way back into my life like he was some missing puzzle piece to my life or something.
I continued walking. I felt like I didn't have much control of my own actions. I finally arrived at the oh so familiar bridge. It's quite an old one. It's one of those back road type bridges.
It used to be a very busy highway and the bridge was one like the golden gate one in San Francisco. Now it's rusted and the road is old and useless.
A new road was implemented elsewhere and this area wasn't needed as much. Needless to say hardly any cars come here and nobody really knows about it.
I had been here a lot of times. This has been where I tried to kill myself.
Bad memories flooded my head and I tried to get most of them out.
Somehow someone always found me and saved me before I could jump.
I only tried to jump once.
Then I tied other methods. They didn't work
I walked over to the edge of the bridge and looked down at the filthy polluted water below.
It was a familiar sight. I took a deep breath and looked down. A solid five minutes passed.
I can do this. It's easy. Just go.
I climbed over the railing and stood on the small cement platform.
Here we go.
I make the motion to jump and my feet release from the platform but instead of plummeting I went nowhere.
I felt a sudden yank and I was pulled back over tumbling backwards onto whoever stopped me.
I stood up.
I look down and see the brunette haired boy lying on the ground still.
I was in shock and sort of angered.
"What the hell?" I asked looking down at him. He stood and looked at me.
He quickly hugged me.
"Oh my fucking god...why..." He muttered.
I looked at him confused and pulled away from the hug.
"Why? I...I don't understand," Tyler said looking at me. His face was plastered with a sad and confused expression.
"Uhm...I..why...does it matter exactly? Why the hell are you even here?"
"I was just walking..then I saw you and well this and..." Tyler said stumbling over his words. He was in complete shock.
I sighed for like the millionth time today.
"Well.." I said not really knowing exactly what to say.
"Hey please keep this between us...I don't wanna end up...like...you know...in that place again," I said. I wasn't willing to openly admit the place I had gone, again.
I probably seemed insane enough to him I don't need to reiterate it.
"Y-yeah dude...uhm...but can we just talk about this...or something else? I don't know...I really just want to talk to you in general even if it's nothing important..." He said.
Those words actually made me feel special.
Wait. Feel? Special?
I had felt numb for so long...why are these emotions all of a sudden appearing. It wasn't bad but I don't know how to properly react to all of this.
Nonetheless I nodded. He motioned for us to sit on the gravel on the side of the road. I sat criss cross as he took a spot directly in front of me.
"So what pushed you over the edge?"
I knew it was coming. It hit hard though. I fell into his lap and started bawling in tears into his left thigh.
He pulled me up into his lap properly and I rested my head on his shoulder still crying.
