Save Me [A Norman Reedus fanfiction - Part 1 - COMPLETED]

Chapter Twenty-Nine - Sentence For a Life-Time

If I would say that the car ride was awkward and embarrassing to the city – I would seriously underrate its levels.

Norman got ready quickly, took a short shower and pulled a new t-shirt on while I was crying silently in my room. I was literally shaking by the desperate anger I felt for myself. Not for him. But yes, a bit for him too.

Why was he sooo nice to me? He's changed like I did... Why?

I couldn't wrap my finger around why I did that too. How could I believe it for a second that Norman Reedus would love a freshly coped junkie bitch who has almost ruined his career and...

But he said he was sorry for putting his career in front of me...

Probably, he only said it because he let himself feeling sorry for me.

A knock on my door startled me out of self-pity. ˝Reira, I'm ready.˝ Norman called , his voice was still sad. I knew he was beating himself for so much things. And I was about to make it worse for him – inadvertantly. I realized that even if I probably had screwed up everything I shouldn't show it. So I decided to act cool as an ice.

I pulled on a dark purple summer dress I used to wear years ago. It was cut at the two sides of my hips and had a very deep clevage, not to mention it only reached to right under my butt. When I looked into the mirror I felt like it was two years ago, when I was about to go and meet my druggie friends. And it felt good. I felt like I found something I thought I had lost since I was out of rehab. But something was missing. So I pulled out my make-up bag, searching for my old eyeliner and lipstick. When I was ready, I almost looked like the old Reira. Only the hair wasn't the same.

I am careless, reckless, emotionless. - I whispered to myself. The girl in the mirror looked right back into my eyes and her faded smile made my stomach churn. I knew I was going to make a mistake. To hurt someone I loved. I knew I shouldn't have... I knew. Then I walked out of my room.

Norman was already out of the house, waiting for me by the door. His back was toward me but when he heard the clicking noise of my high heels, he turned around. And the look on his face told me that I indeed looked like the old me. He stared at me with plain fear.

˝Reira...˝ He started while I was passing by him and was starting to walk down on the stairs. It was hard because I haven't worn high heels in months and I talk about HIGH heels. How could have I made that situation even worse? If I would have broken my neck on the stairs. But fortunately, Murphy wasn't on duty, so I made it to the bottom of the staircase and I was halfway to the car, when I decided to react.

˝Yes?˝ I asked back, without looking at him. ˝Is there any problem?˝

Silence – he didn't say a word... He couldn't. For about a minute we stood like that. I was in the middle of the yard and he was standing up on the porch. I couldn't bear any more moment of it.

˝Greg's waiting for us. Let's go.˝

We were halfway when Norman cleared his throat. ˝We need to talk.˝

Dread filled me. Does he really want to talk about that humiliating moment?!

˝About what?˝ I scoffed, trying to hide my anxiety.

˝About the next week˝ He sighed, not looking at me. I tried to figure out what he was talking about, but had no clue. ˝You forgot about the trip to the custodian office?˝

Oh shit! I did forget about that.

I felt like I was in a trap. We had just decided to keep on living together as a big family but after what happened I couldn't be sure how things would sort out... Mingus had already known that we'd still live together and the thought of breaking his tender heart broke mine too. But I knew I wouldn't be able to face Norman more than I should, for a lifetime. Deep inside I knew that our life had ended back on the porch.