Just My Life

Trouble Much

I don't remember my trip from Egypt to England I just know it happened or how else did I end up living here? Of course there's 'I was born in England', but that’s really unlikely. And it wasn’t just my skin colour, but it was the fact that when I was about three years old I realised that it was up to me and my brother to do all the talking and learning, since my parents where clueless about anything foreign.

Also if my sources are correct, when my older brother and I were born a year apart, we lived in my father’s unknown home town in Egypt. It was on the thirteenth floor, and when we went to visit it, I mentally noted that there was no elevator. My mum and dad, living on the thirteenth floor, walking up and down the stairs all day… somehow, I found that really hard to believe.

My first house in England, wasn't really a house, it was a Bed and Breakfast. Me and my brother used to go down to the kitchen with the money our dad gave us to buy ourselves breakfast with, except we didn’t buy breakfast, we had breakfast on the house.

It was pretty simple how we did it really, my brother who was 4 than, had made friends with the cooks dog. That’s why she gave us breakfast for free; we kept Bruno, the dog, occupied while she was doing her job in the kitchen.

What that meant was, we got free breakfast, a pet, and we had money to buy sweets from the shop round the corner. The man that owned the corner shop, who couldn’t have been older than 25, was not particularly nice, and didn’t hide the fact that he hated children, which is kind of ironic seeing that not so long ago he was a child himself. My brother and I used to love to annoy him, like the time there was a group of 4 high school girls in buying magazines and sweets. Before they could buy anything we went up to them, I tugged one of their hands. In unison, they all looked down at me, as my eyes swelled with tears.

“I can’t find my mummy”, I sobbed. And my brother came from behind me and started rubbing my back.

“It’s okay”, he whispered soothingly, just loud enough for them to hear. “all we have to do is wait for someone to come and get us, or take us to the b and b, then we’ll be fine, just watch, we will”, he sounded so convincing that if I hadn’t been in on the trick I would have believed him myself. I made my eyes go round and innocent.

“Where will we find someone to take us though? We don’t know the way, and I’m scared, I just want to go home” I clung to him, burying my face in the crook of his neck, he patted my back rhythmically, until I felt more then heard the girls shift behind us.

“We can take you home, do you know what your bed and breakfast is called?” one of them finally said. I looked up with sad brown eyes and shook my head.

“I do” my brother spoke up, and my eyes lit up with joy, I started buzzing and vibrating and looked up at the sky to make sure my eyes twinkled, yeah, I was a pro. I squealed in delight and took the hand of the girl that said she would take us, I beamed up at her and she picked me up, cuddling me closely. She had forgotten that she was here to buy something.

Just before she was about to walk out, her whole group in tow, I looked back at the guy behind the cashier, he was staring a hole in my forehead, I squirmed a little. I stuck my tongue out at him and watched, amused, as he shook his fist at me. He was mumbling something about losing customers because of those darn kids, classic.

“I don’t like that guy”, I said sleepily, lifting my thumb to my mouth and began to suck it, making soft sucking sounds the girls around me cooed at. I noticed that they weren’t fussing over my brother, he was after all as cute as me, we might as well be twins, because we look exactly like each other, except with me, I had longer hair and eyelashes, and I had darker eyes than him.

I looked back for him and what I saw left a grimace on my face, he had that look on him, when he just discovered something about someone and was going to use it to his advantage. I can’t explain it properly, but my brother and I weren’t exactly normal. We had a 6th sense, we don’t know where it came from, but a gut feeling told me not to tell anyone about it. So we didn’t.

My brother, Oliver, knows stuff about people. The way he describes it, is that the universe gives him information when he needs it, like now, the universe was telling him that the girl with the dark skin and beautiful extensions, is absolutely bonkers, about cats.

How I knew? I think you would guess by now that I can read thoughts, I don’t hear them, I just know them, like if you ask me what the girl in the yellow dress that was sitting opposite of you on the bus this morning was thinking, I would just know, without a thought, I would just come to me.

I also have a really strong intuition, I can smell danger from a mile away, which is useful in so many ways, as you can imagine. It helps us get away with all the pranks we do, yes we might be three, and four, but we have all the knowledge we need, to be able to make the strongest bully grovel at our feet. I would go on and on about how we can take over the world and whatnot but let’s face it, even I know it’s impossible, and I’m three.

Oliver walked over to the girl who, after further investigation, I found out was called Vicky, and tugged at her arm, as I did to the girl who was carrying me and currently tickling my chin. I saw her bend down to listen to what he was saying, and became instantly interested.

I watched her eyes widen and I could’ve sworn were about to pop out of their sockets. Then it hit me, hard and clear. I had to bite a big chunk out of my check to stop myself laughing. My genius brother had told her, and I quote ‘that man scares me, I saw him grab a cat by the neck and kick him out of the store, boot and all. It’s scary what he can do to a helpless little kitten; I mean I hate people that would do any-’.

He didn’t get to finish, Vicky was already up and confronting the guy. The man had a smug look on his face as if saying, ha she came back, unfortunately for him he didn’t know what she was about to do, he only thought she was there to buy something, he couldn’t have been more wrong.

When she was there she grabbed his ear and dragged him from behind the counter, the girls were watching wide eyed, while my brother and I were trying so hard not to laugh. Oliver glanced up at me, and I busted out in silent laughter. It was hilarious; Vicky was holding a guy twice her size by the ear and screaming in his face about how animal cruelty was horrible and how he liked getting kicked out of a place you like.

She got the man and kicked him in the bum and he went flying into a tinned tomato soup display. At that point everyone was gasping in hysterical giggles and couldn’t contain themselves, my brother was punching the floor and trying to get his breath.

Emily had put me down, and I ran to my brother, his face was red and he was wheezing he looked ridiculously slap-stick. Emily was holding her belling and half laughing half wincing, and two girls were holding onto each other with tears rolling down their cheeks. Vicky, however, was still fuming and was glaring at the shop keeper. If looks could kill, the man would have been deader than dead.

After every one had composed themselves we looked around the store to see the damage caused, there was tomato soup all over the floor and dented cans with it. The man was covered in soup and if you looked close enough you could swear he had steam coming out of his ears. If it wasn’t so funny it would have been terrifying.

My brother gently tugged at Emily’s sleeve, having returned to the innocent act and told her that we better go, or else he won’t allow them in the shop ever again. She just patted his head, (which he hates, may I add, and walked over to Vicky trying to calm her down, before she did anything else that would endanger us of suffering a case of laughing to death,

“After all this, he won’t want to see out faces or he’ll call the police” she chuckled. We took off to the bed and breakfast and just as the shop were coming out of sight, my brother and I glanced at each other and whispered, “Result”.