Let me in (S.M)

seventeen

song I recommend for this chapter: Apologise by Josh Franklin

"We've been together six months, y'know?" I smile to Violet, who's lying on my bed, scrolling through her phone.

She looks to me and smiles, "someone's been counting."

"But, like, that's crazy isn't it? I mean, I'd known you for like a month before but still, half a year." I breathe out.

She nods, "yeah, I know."

"You alright?" I ask, noticing her eyes drift slightly.

"If you had the chance to do something, like-your dream, would you?" She asks quietly, not looking at me.

"Sure, but, I'm living my dream right now." I chuckle at her.

"Mhmm." She mumbles, looking partly defeated.

"Why'd you ask?" I question, turning back to my computer.

"No reason." She replies.

Violet:

"How do I tell him without hurting him?" I ask Harry, who sits across from me.

"Violet, I mean, c'mon-he isn't twelve, he's an adult." Harry says, his phone in his hand.

"That doesn't mean he won't be hurt, I'm there for six months at the least Harry, I couldn't be with him and be halfway across the world." I sigh, pushing my hair back.

Harry looks to me, "so, wait-are you saying that you'd break up with him if you went?"

"I-I-I don't know." I whisper.

"Violet, just think about what is more important to you; your relationship or your dream." Harry calmly replies.

I sit and think about what Harry said long after he leaves, the words swimming around my mind. What do I want more? Do I want the feeling of Simon or the happiness of the job? I want both. 

But I know I can't have it.

I check the time on my phone and see it's half eleven, I have half an hour to get back to the company or the offer's gone.

Violet: simon?

Simon: hey, what's up, you alright?

Violet: do you think you could meet me

Violet: we need to talk

Simon: the coffee shop, ten minutes?

Violet: okay

I walk in to the coffee shop, the sweet smell of coffee making me shiver slightly. I see Simon sitting in his Sidemen hoodie and jogging bottoms in his booth. I walk to him and he turns to me and smiles, I sit across from him.

"What's up?" He asks.

"I got a job offer." I avoid eye contact, not wanting to see how he feels.

"You-you what? I don't understand, you have a job?" He questions, confusion in his voice.

"It's a new job, I got a call last week, it's to illustrate this new comic series." I reply, fiddling with my fingers in the process to try and distract me.

"Violet, that's incredible." Simon says happily, reaching for my hand but I pull it away.

"It's in America." I mumble.

Simon doesn't say anything for a few seconds, "America?"

"It's for at least six months." I admit.