Hey guys it's another rant and I'm too lazy for a proper intro so let's get into it!
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So anybody here want superpowers? Of coarse you do. Well I'm about to tell you all the super powers I want because they make life better for me and if it helps someone else? I don't care.
1) I want to be able to smell when someone is saying bullshit, that way when I sneeze during a conversation my amazing line "sorry I'm allergic to bullshit" will make sense and I will be able to call someone out.
2) I want the power to make someone feel cramps everytime they lie in my presence. That way everytime they lie and say they are cramping I can say "be honest with yourself. Doesn't lying hurt?"
3) I want my body oder to smell like candy. Why? Because after a workout and I want to relax and maybe get a hug. When I get that hug I don't want someone to say "ew you stink". Maybe my girlfriend will say one day "go and work out!" Because she wants to smell my candy. Maybe taste the candy cain? Wink wink? Hey don't think like that you little pervs! I didn't imply anything you just thought it and I called you out! That means you are stuck thinking about how I just flipped things onto you and now You feel like a perv and you blame me. And now I'm in your head and you are paranoid that I know everything you're thinking.
4) I want to control all aspects of technology with my mind. In this generation that basically means immortality.
5)I want the power to cure autism and Down syndrome. Not because I want to be a good person but because these people ask too many questions, don't know boundaries, ask dumb questions, and can be rather annoying. Boom! Cured! Now you don't bother me so much. Maybe it's rude of me to say these things but honestly it's true. I can try to tolerate these people and honestly I do. I don't hate them but long term exposure to these people starts to give me headaches and drives me closer to insanity. You can't tell me that you are completely at peace when you speak or listen to an autistic or downs person.
6) I want the power to mute people. Just a remote with a mute button that only works with my thumb print. That way if I ever argue with someone and they need to stop and listen instead of blurt out or interrupt you BOOM mute. Now I'm going to talk and you have to either listen or leave. Good luck leaving because then I can't UnMute you.
7) I want the power to display my thoughts to people so that they can realize how little I actually give a shit
8) not really a power but I want a supernatural guidance figure that lives within my head and can appear in person before everyone else and can help me with countless things.
9) I want the power to supercharge another person with common sense using my pure will so that when someone is doing something stupid my anger alone at why they are doing it will convince them to do something smart instead.
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10) I want the power to become one of my edgy OC's because fucking edgelord right here.
